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A bad night. ( Ramble)
Tonight is a bad night, and sick with the certainty that the stars are going out, and my life will never be any better than broken and empty, I feel small. Small and alone. Though somehow I feel even smaller on the inside. As cliches pour through my mind like so much teenage chatter on a bus, I want to scream at them to 'like, shut up, like'. It's freezing, freezing, freezing, yet in but a t-shirt I burn like possessed with a fatal fever, both hot and cold. And in the corner of my eye, or maybe just the corner of my mind, flickers the laughter of shadows So tired, but I will not sleep. Exhausted, yet I pace and fidget, twitch and move constantly in restless indignation. How such a large and empty house can press so closely upon me, to push upon my mind, yet echo endlessly with unsettling sounds, escapes my understanding. So strange to wish for nothing but tears, yet neither will I cry. And still, every imagined and remembered misery plays on repeat on the iMax of my mental cinema. A solo screening. No popcorn.
