A place of safety for expression

This is what Rick said in his response to Aaron (I think it was Aaron, my memory is not so good): [This forum is a] place of safety for expression ...'. To me this means a place to talk about things that you can't talk to anyone else about.

Tonight this is what I want to say, that I can't talk about to anyone I know. It makes me want to cry and shout and swear very badly.

I had surgery on Monday and came out of hospital yesterday. I had my throat cut open - a parathyroid operation. The surgery was required because of something caused by one of the psych meds I take. A rare side effect apparenty. Anyway, all went ok, as far as surgery goes.

Yesterday is where the problem started: My mother insisted that I tell my siblings that I'd had surgery. I sent them all a brief email, simply stating I'd had parathyroid surgery.

One of my brothers emailed me back and said 'I hope you are feeling better after your lobotomy.'

I have a good sense of humour most of the time, but I don't think this is remotely funny. In fact I think it just shows the level of stigma and discrimination, not out there, but within my own family. The worst form of stigma is not always in the big things, it is in the subtle things, the things that slip under the radar, the things from left field that hurt the most.

I am not looking for solutions and I don't want to talk to my family about it - I have 'informed' them many times about mental illness - I just want to get it out of my system. I just want someone else to say: 'It stinks'. Because, to me it does. It stinks.