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Personal connection to relationships

wiljmbNew Contributor01 Sept 2026, 5:08 pm AEST

Personal connection to relationships

I’m honestly really bad when it comes to relationships. I genuinely yearn to have a relationship and feel close to someone, but I seem to either push myself away or push the other person away.

I can become really attached after just one hangout, start overthinking everything, and get emotionally invested way too quickly. Other times I completely shut down and become distant. It feels like I can’t find a healthy middle ground.

I’m looking for advice on how to approach dating and relationships in a healthier way, especially when the other person might not want a relationship with me. I want to learn how to accept that without feeling like I’ve just gone through a breakup, because sometimes I barely even know the person yet.

How do you stop yourself from getting so attached so quickly, manage expectations, and still allow yourself to enjoy getting to know someone without becoming emotionally dependent on the outcome?

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In response to: Personal connection to relationships

D4DolphinModerator01 Sept 2026, 7:57 pm AEST

Re: Personal connection to relationships

Thanks for joining us here on the forums, @wiljmb. You are very welcome here. And thank you for sharing the challenges you are experiencing in finding some emotional balance in forming relationships.

Relationships are hard. And each one is unique. You are asking all the right questions – how to stop myself from getting over-attached, avoid emotional dependence and give myself time to get to know someone? And on the other hand, how not to shut down? Being conscious of these questions and curious about them will itself help you to move towards that healthier middle ground.

Everyone has to work at aligning expectations with another person when it comes to forming relationships – this ain’t easy.

Here in the forums is a good place to bounce these questions off other people. Different perspectives help bring focus and clarity. We are all in this together.

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