SanCasual Contributor
Struggling while working away from home
Hi all. I'm really struggling at the moment - I'm working away from home in another state from my partner and dog for over a month. I have a chronic illness plus major depression and bpd traits. Before I left I felt my depression was getting bad again and my doctor put up my dose of antidepressants. My work is in the arts and very stressful - I am not being properly paid and most of the team (from three up to five of us) are living together in one house. Last week we worked a number of 12hr days. Luckily I have my own room at the moment. One of the women I am working with has started to pick on me, I think partly due to finding out by accident that her new boyfriend dated me 7 years ago (I had a bad experience with him). I tried to talk to her about it months ago and sent her a message but got no response - I told her it was a long time ago and people change and I wished her the best with him. Now she has started interfering with my role when her department has nothing to do with mine and is causing issues with my other working relationships. She is opinionated and I don't really like conflict and can get flustered when put on the spot. I have told our "boss" and she said she understands that this person can put people off side but said she doesn't think her behaviour is malicious. On top of that I was indecently assaulted on the street in broad daylight last weekend, the second time a man has grabbed at me which really triggered me. I spent two hours in the police station giving a statement. My partner also has depression and he was very upset at what happened to me. Today I had to deal with another run in with my "boss" and the girl who is causing issues. I had a big chat with my "boss" so things are good with us but I was so upset I couldn't calm down. I haven't felt that absolutely crushing anxiety, sadness and despair for a very long time. I tried to talk with my partner but he was at work and said it was stressing him out and he didn't want to hear about the issues I was having with the girl I work with again. I felt cornered and so desperate. I had to take some medication and go to bed for the rest of the day, making me miss work. I have spoken to my doctor and she said I have to insist on my own room while I'm there for my mental health but not sure how that will go down. I really believe in the work we are doing but it doesn't feel worth all these issues and the pain of being away from my loved ones yet I can't just pull out and go home as it will ruin my reputation.