BPD, struggling and parnter wants to move...I don't know what to do!

Ok this is my first time posting in a forum, so, not sure is this is right.

I have been dealing with depression for over half my life, and was diagnosed with BPD about 6 months ago. Everything is beginging to make sense now I have the correct diagnosis, but I have continued on a downward spiral, question myself over every choice I've made. I am on meds for depression and seeing a psychologist and also have a case worker to help me deal with it all. I live with my partner of 8 years and our 3 kids in my hometown, close to the only family support I've ever had. My partner is struggling with my diagnosis, and looking after the kids on my off days. He also started a small business 18 months ago. He resents my illness, and my family, even though he doesn't say those words.

We have been arguing every other day for almost the last 12 months, and it's just getting worse. Now he has decided he wants us all to move 500km away from here, and I just don't know if I can do that.
The only benefit I can see is the rent is cheaper. For him and the girls they will be close to his parents, who are nice enough, but I am not very close too.
I want to be all for this, I want to be there and support him, as I feel so guilty that he has unwittingly become my carer. But I don't know if I am strong enough, or ready to make such a big choice. He is at the point of saying maybe we just call it quits completely. That he will just take the kids and move there anyway. I just don't know what to do. Do I give it all and move towns? Or do I just say this is the end? He blames me most days that I am not doing my job as a mother, and that I am making his life harder, which is the truth, but it hurts. If he leaves, I lose my kids and my partner. If I go with him, I lose my support network of family, friends and professionals. And before saying, he is my parnter, he should be my main support, he has already said he can't cope and deal with it all.

Thanks for any help