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Advice

MMPNew Contributor13 Mar 2017, 7:56 pm AEDT

Advice

My partner of 3 years and friend of 36 years ... has been admitted to hospital after self destructive behaviours ... and suicidal thoughts to only me but not to the rest of his family or friends - wore a mask. He's a medical professional. I slapped him literally into hospital and we became so close through this crisis. Prior to hospital he had asked me for space - the space provided him too much time to become asked destructive but gave the excuse it was me and my two children. He left hospital a week ago under the care of psychiatrist and medication etc ... I felt Ill prepared and find myself now again in space as he asks for time apart to heal he can't deal with a relationship whilst trying to find his Ian identity ..... I feel broken myself now after reaching crisis point 😞 any advice would help ... I'm respecting the space and healing time and trying for it not to be about me 🙂

5 replies

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In response to: Advice

AppleblossomSenior Contributor13 Mar 2017, 8:34 pm AEDT

Re: Advice

I have nothing particular to advise, you seem sensitive and caring, just want you to know you have been heard.

I am enjoying art at the moment and think sometimes old fashioned ways of courting can help.

Good Luck

In response to: Re: Advice

NikNikSenior Contributor20 Mar 2017, 3:54 pm AEDT

Re: Advice

Hi @MMP

It's so hard to keep the space when all you want to do is help. You also have your own needs, which are not being met - and it's okay to feel that way! You shouldn't feel guilty about that.

How have things been over the past few days? Do they still want space or are you reconnecting again?

Nik

In response to: Advice

Unknown userMember29 Mar 2017, 4:30 pm AEDT

Re: Advice

Hi there @MMP

A very warm welcome to the forums, thank you for sharing with us.

That sounds incredibly tough going through all of that with your partner, I think what you are doing is great and very helpful. Just try to still be his partner and be yourself, you could even ask what support works for him and if that is space then that is okay but you will still need to check in every now and then because you are concerned about him and that is helpful to maintain your boundaries with him.

Hope things are going okay? Thinking of you,

Lunar 🙂

In response to: Re: Advice

Unknown userMember01 Apr 2017, 5:23 pm AEDT

Re: Advice

hi @MMP

i dont really have much advice to offer you but welcome to the forums and i hope you find the help you deserve

how are you travelling? has anything improved for you?

In response to: Advice

ivanaSenior Contributor04 Apr 2017, 2:00 pm AEST

Re: Advice

Hi @MMP,

Maybe you could use this time to do some relaxation and also to reflect on yourself and the relationship and contemplate is there anything your doing "wrong" or could do different to improve the dynamics of the relationship.

Its a sign of maturity that you are not taking it personally.It sounds like your partner is making a sensible decision to have some "breathing space" and figure out his own identity first instead of going back into potentially unhealthy patterns.

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