TheInternalFireCasual Contributor
Younger Brother Struggling with Delusions (and it's eating me alive) - please help.
Hello, first time member, first time poster on here. I can't type this without crying, I can't work without crying, having trouble sleeping, having trouble focusing on my own family (2 little kids). I just need some support in some way because I can't recall a time I've been so mentally taxed.
So, here goes:
Younger brother is now 37, he's single, he's the youngest of 6 boys in my family. Our mom died in 2004, our father died in 2016. He's certainly on the spectrum, has no real friends or relationships, lives alone in a condo, and is functional (has a full time job). Not much of a drinker and i've never experienced him consuming any sort of drugs. He's a difficult person to talk to, very introverted, moody at times....sort of a wild card. A good guy, though--wouldn't hurt a fly, means well, does not cause any problems for anyone in my family. Pretty much to sum it up, he's lived a life of social isolation and top dollar says he's experienced severe depression over the years. Out of all my brothers, I'm the closest to him; not only in age (I'm 40), but in terms of person-to-person relationships.
He's never expressed any delusional thoughts until an incident occurred at the end of July, 3 months ago. Typically, he's a decent communicator over text. Not an immediate responder, but does get back to you. In late July, he seemed to have gone dark and was not responding to any texts or calls, and after 2 days I called in a wellness check with the cops. He wasn't home but at his job, and they said he seemed fine and that he'll get back to us and let us know he's okay cause we were all obviously worried. He took 1.5 hours to respond to any previous texts that day and he did see how serious the situation was..no urgency. Just responded "I'm good, thanks" and he's never provided any explanation as to what that was. That was thr first time ever he was withdrawing from family. I went up to see him a day later and he told me "someone is spraying chemicals of some sort into my condo in the middle of the night and it's preventing me from sleeping" and he's been saying this now for a few months, he's lost a lot of weight, looks frail, but ironic enough, saying "other than the non-sleep, I feel great". For what it's worth, he told me other day he had hernia surgery in mid-June (month before incident)...not sure if he was prescribed anything. Then rest of summer, he said "no thanks" to any family invites, plans, events, etc.
Fast forward to 4 days ago, 10/25 (exactly 3 months from first incident)----he voluntarily went down to the police station to complain about the "spraying" and inquired if anyone else in his complex complained about something similar. he then refused police to go check his condo out and refused me and my othr brother going to check his place out to identify what could be off. He also recently seems very confused, disoriented, and hollow eyed. For what it's worth he answers no to being suicidal, depressed, or violent towards others. Although when I asked him if he's depressed, I could see his eyes watering up which basically cut a hole in my heart to see cause I want to help him so badly that I'd go to the end of the earth to have him feel better. Several people I've talked to have asked me if he's taking drugs and as I mentioned above, I've never seen him take a drug in his life, but I can't rule anything out. I seem to find it a little odd (the timing) with the hernia surgery in June, then in July starts mentioning these delusions (although he says they've been happening for a year or so). Surprised he never mentioned anything ever before july. The timing is sort of suspect. He doesn't even drink alcohol really, so drugs are a far fetch in my mind, but who really knows.
So, now it's gotten to a point where 3 of my other brothers and I are going to sit down with him altogether tomorrow night (completely judgement-free) and try to explain how we feel and how we know he's not feeling right...and it could possibly benefit him by speaking to a professional and potentially taking medications.
I'm sure I forgot some details, but those are the broad strokes as to what's going on. We've reached out to his county mental health crisis hotline and they suggested we speak with him and try to get him to be compliant to seek help or they can send someone to his home (although that may not go over well). So we are going with the former and I know he'll refuse and say "no thanks" or "i'm good" but we have to try cause this is killing me inside, I can't focus on anything and I'm terrified of what could happen if he doesn't seek treatment. Literally eating me alive cause he's alone, struggling with his own demons and doesn't know what true reality is nor does he know how to get out of his universe he is stuck in.
Thanks for reading. Any modicum of tips or self-assurances here would be appreciated to no end. I just need some sort of relief cause I don't know how much time is of the essence nor do I know when he will actually sit down with a professional (if ever).
Thank you
