I quit work by accident

Its ok if they havent @FearofUnknown what you experienced was real fear and your allowed to have that and your story of lived experience will be what activates you own trauma responses so know they are validated regardless of others rxperiences.

it happened a while a go and you have recently apologised by email and thats triggering the stored memory is that correct?

be easy on yourself and look at it this way it seemed like your dream job until it presented an aspect of it that made you feel unsafe and it was wise to leave that encvironment as high chance it may happen again.

i went to work over 2 years ago. a year ago i was sacked for the incaoacity to perform my role so yaccidentally unemployed i spose.

just this paragraph of brushing over it is causing me to overwhelm but i have pooky and mountain so i will do it then regulate.

went to work normal sunny day have had zero work capacity since from what happened that day the way my fight flight got activated i have no control of it being triggered anymore and i will physically appear aggresive and hostile before my brain even knows my bodies having trauma response.

im not actually aggressive or hostile truth is from my side i am actually scared and whatever it was that startled me im in fllight till i feel safe or able to reprocess clearly whats going on.

if someone or somethings in my way im not walking around it fight part of me is moving it, going through or over it with no thought of repercussion just supporting flight.

which scares the s$%% out of me because im not that person. its happened 3 times so i isolate from public now scared of causing harm to myself, others or property.

the similarity being fear. its easy to crtiisize self from a state of calm that doesnt mean its an accurate or fair way to judge our response to any situation under duress.

fear is real when its experienced, we are wired to avoid fear as a survival instinct and will do things that seem overboard once we feel safe.

you done what you had to do at that time and you were scared allow yourself that knowledge because hind sight wasnt there then to help you.

Sorry if my post triggered something for you @REDLINEZ750 . Hope you are alright from it.

There's a lot of good points in what you said like seeing the unsafe side to work. It was also a physically demanding job and 3 other colleagues as well as me all hurt ourselves at some point with 2 of those colleagues on Work Cover. So, I guess it wasn't the perfect Dream Job after all, like you said.

It's also interesting to hear your side of the story about how your Flight and Fight response works. I believe you are a kind person not a hostile one, so I guess it is more your Fight response activating when you do become hostile.

All in all, thanks for the lengthy reply, I had a good read.

no need to apologise, @FearofUnknown, i only went where was able regulate myself from, i wanted you to see that you done no wrong and hoped that would help.

thank you for commenting you see kindness in our interactions, you too seem to be a very caring soul ,in an uncaring world.

hope your having a good day!

@FearofUnknown Your post title got me intrigued! And I am glad it did, because I found reading your experience and @REDLINEZ750 's quite interesting and thought-provoking (in a positive sense).

PS - You are correct that growing cannabis for personal use in the ACT is legal - but buying or selling it is not (including the seeds used to grow the plants).

Jobs can often look like a 'dream' from the outside, and we don't know what its really like until we're inside for some time.

In terms of my own experiences, I haven't "accidentally" quit a job but I have had an experience where I had to revert from a temporary role due to panic attacks. The temporary role was one I had hoped would give me excellent experience and open opportunities for moving out of my "normal" role/unit (which I desperately wanted to move away from). However due to an adverse medical reaction I got panic attacks within the first month of this new role, and was unable to work/function. I didn't know the new team well enough to feel I could ask/rely-on them to accommodate my drastically-reduced ability to work (even after a whole month off work), and made the very difficult decision to revert to my "normal" role/unit instead so I could return to work quicker.

I will never know what would have happened if I had stayed in that temporary role. Would I have been able to get the support I needed? Or would I have felt unsupported and escalated my panic attacks whilst also destroying my strong work reputation?

I am at peace with the decision I made, because I know it was what I needed at the time. And after a further month the panic/anxiety was all gone again (its the only time in my life I have had problems with anxiety; it is not something I usually experience, for which I am thankful).

But do I wonder and sometimes feel partial regret? Absolutely.

But I also know that it is possible that the temporary role/unit was fruitless and would have demoralised me and not opened doors to new opportunities. (I kept a little bit of an eye on the work outputs, but didn't see much progress over it's limited lifetime; and I knew there was some scepticism early on about whether it would flourish or flounder).

I'm not sure if my experience sharing helps in some way. I hope it does; or if not helps, at least makes you feel less alone in having your mental health interfere with work opportunities.

Since leaving work, the ex-Boss has added more marijuana/cannabis products all disguised under the name "Hemp" including Hemp Seed Oil, Cannabics Dog Biscuits and of course, the Hemp Seeds. Looks like he is continuing to support the legalisation of marijuana even after that incident which is such a shame! I guess I can be 'at peace with my decision' to leave work because I don't want to be forced to sell products I don't support. So, I guess it wasn't the perfect Dream Job after all, like you said.

And thanks for sharing your work-related story @AlwaysMyself . I hate how all the medications we are given have side effects and it definitely was unavoidable that you were having anxiety/panic attacks from your medication. You definitely had no choice but to give up your job. Personally, I've tried so many different medications and have suffered from drastic side effects to all of them.

All in all, thanks for the lengthy reply, I had a good read.

Could you please give me some advice and/or share your opinion about my story @NightFury and @MatchaToad and @DogMan79 . I really appreciate it. Looking forward to your reply.

Hi @FearofUnknown

Thank you for tagging me in this post. I hope what I have to say may provide you with some comfort/support.

It is clear from your story that you went through a deeply distressing and confusing situation. What you're describing isn't just a simple mistake; it sounds like a significant trauma response to a situation where you felt your safety and your values were under threat.

Losing a dream job in such an abrupt way is heartbreaking, and it is completely normal to feel a heavy sense of regret. I wanted to share some of my thoughts on the situation, the nature of fear, and how to look at what happened with more self-compassion.

I can see in your post that you asked people if we have experienced the "fight or flight" response, and I have many times throughout my life. When your brain perceives a threat (in your case, the creepy man and the suspicious behaviour of your boss), the amygdala (the brain's alarm system) takes over. During the fight or flight response, the prefrontal cortex (the part of your brain responsible for logic) goes offline to save energy for your survival, causing you to be unable to think clearly. That being said, you didn't "accidentally" quit in the traditional sense; your brain decided that the environment was no longer safe for you. You were not choosing to leave a job; you were choosing to survive a perceived threat.

It makes perfect sense why you felt the way you did. You were in NSW, where the laws are strict, whereas your boss was looking at ACT laws. That discrepancy, combined with seeing the plants, would naturally lead anyone to feel that something illegal or dangerous was happening. And when your finance manager stopped you from calling the police, it likely added to your sense of isolation and fear. In a healthy workplace, your safety concerns should have been validated, not dismissed, and I am truly sorry that this did not happen.

Regarding the regret and aftermath of that situation, many people have made life-altering decisions while under extreme stress; you are certainly not alone in that. It's easy to look back a year later and think "I should have stayed". But you are looking back with a "calm" brain. The person you were on that day was in a state of acute panic. You cannot blame your calm self for the actions of your panicked self. I suppose it is understandable that the boss won't hire you back, but his "forgiveness" is a good sign for your own closure. It means you can stop carrying the weight of that bridge being "burned" and start focusing on your own healing.

I know you mentioned this was your dream job, and it is okay to grieve that. However, a dream job that makes you feel unsafe or puts you in a position where you feel that you have to report illegal activity may not have been the "dream" it appeared to be on the surface. Please try to forgive yourself. You acted to protect yourself when you felt unprotected by your employers. That is an act of self-preservation, not a failure of character.

Hi @FearofUnknown

I have had something kind of similar happen. I worked briefly as a support worker, supporting young people with disabilities. I was rostered on to support a young client, who had just turned 18. I didn't know at the time, but legally she hadn't been allowed to see her Mum until she turned 18. A couple of weeks after turning 18, she asked me to take her to an address. So, I did. It turns out it was her Mum's house. We walked in the door and there were several people in the loungeroom openly smoking and doing drugs.

This triggered my own flight response and I wanted nothing more than to leave the house, and put as much distance between myself and the house as possible. But it would have been unprofessional of me, so I stayed until the client decided it was time to leave. Following my rostered shift, I contacted my supervisor and put in a complaint. The client had to apologise to me and promise that she wouldn't put me in that position again, but I didn't want to work with her again. I didn't want to expose myself to that kind of lifestyle or the possible consequences of being around that lifestyle. And...it impacted my sense of safety. My supervisor could not replace the hours with another client and my hours dried up, which left me with no choice but to resign.

It sounds quite similar to your situation. You were confronted by something that made you feel unsafe and it came up against a personal boundary. That boundary exists because it goes against your values. You have done nothing wrong. In fact, you've done what you needed to do for yourself.

I also want to add, you can feel regret and it can still be the right thing for you to do. I regretted not being the right kind of support for my client and not being able to meet my client's support needs due to those needs crossing a personal boundary, but that was also the reason why I needed to stop working with her. I wasn't the right person for her.

I was just thinking - I wonder if it would help to sit and write down the things that made it feel like your "dream" job? Then do some research into jobs that might match that? It might give you an idea of the things that you need, or that you're looking for in a job.

Thank you for sharing your experiences @NightFury . It's such an eye-opener

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@FearofUnknown wrote:

Could you please give me some advice and/or share your opinion about my story @NightFury and @MatchaToad and @DogMan79 . I really appreciate it. Looking forward to your reply.

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@FearofUnknown

I don't know sorry

But keep any documentation. Emails like that spell out in black and white some of your limitations for DSP claims. Which I'm assuming is close to on the cards if you've already tried wage subsidy