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Mum and Sister won't stop fighting

PeterStrahmSenior Contributor30 Sept 2025, 5:24 pm AEST

Mum and Sister won't stop fighting

My mother and sister argue every day. Not simple disagreements but full on shouting matches that are heard across our two-story house. Sometimes multiple times a day. I'm disabled and fully dependent on mum. During their arguments, I'm brought into them 90% of the time (e.g they try to use me as an excuse for their actions or say I agree with them) and this causes the other to turn on me. They also start criticizing my health conditions and my mother keeps airing out things about my symptoms/diagnosis that I don't want my sister knowing. When I ask to be transferred into my bedroom (I am disabled and cannot transfer without mum), I am refused so I'm stuck being in the middle of the shouting and constantly triggered. Then when I have seizures because I'm being triggered, or I have a panic attack, I get yelled at.

3 replies

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In response to: Mum and Sister won't stop fighting

rav3nSenior Contributor30 Sept 2025, 6:11 pm AEST

Re: Mum and Sister won't stop fighting

hey @PeterStrahm it's nice to see you around the forums again 😊

i'm so sorry to hear that your mum and sister have been dragging you into these arguments, and not respecting your requests to be moved to your room. it's really awful that's its led to you have seizures and panic attacks too, this absolutely unfair on you.

is there a safe person that you are able to get support from? would you feel comfy with texting 1800RESPECT? they might be able to provide further resources to support you. we're also going to send you a lil check-in email so please keep an eye out for it. you deserve to feel safe and heard 💙

In response to: Re: Mum and Sister won't stop fighting

PeterStrahmSenior Contributor30 Sept 2025, 6:21 pm AEST

Re: Mum and Sister won't stop fighting

The only people I can talk to are my therapists, but I don't like contacting them outside of my appointments. They're aware of things at home.
I could contact RESPECT if things get worse. I usually just wait until my therapy appointments because it's hard explaining my symptoms and how the environment at home triggers me to people who don't know my situation.
I'm okay. I'm used to this environment. I'm working on getting carers so at least I don't have to be around when they argue.

In response to: Re: Mum and Sister won't stop fighting

rav3nSenior Contributor30 Sept 2025, 6:40 pm AEST

Re: Mum and Sister won't stop fighting

i'm glad to hear you've got supports like your therapist available to you. do keep reaching out to them as you need, and if you're ever feeling unsafe, please don't hesitate to contact 000. your safety comes first! @PeterStrahm

it does suck that you've had to get 'used' to this sort of treatment. i really hope that a new carer comes through soon, i've got my fingers crossed! glad you've been able to chat here, let us know if there's anything we can do to help support you 💙

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