Not the getaway i had planned

We drove to QLD august 24, had overnight

stops in van. Husband has 3 siblings living in

QLD We had a 2 week stay at his sisters home.

She has undiagnosed OCD. I’ve known her

since I was 17. I knew 2 weeks

staying there was too much, very

uncomfortable. She was already stressed as

another brother wanted to stay as much as he

could, he lives 90 minutes from

Sister, and has FOMO, he uses weed and

alcohol to excess. SIL wanted him to stay with

their other sister, she was stressing about

showering for 7 people.Normally it’s just her

and hubby, now there was 6 and brother wanted

to make the most of our visit. He was put out at

not being able to sleepover.

My daughter is ASD with social anxiety.

when we arrive daughter uses the toilet and flushes 3 times. SIL mentions that

she can hear the 3 flushes. Things settle down though. the next day I go for a walk

with hubby daughter and my son. We arrive back at SIL and she takes me into

another room. She is stressed and verbally attacks me and my daughter saying I

know your daughter is on her period and i saw you hand washing her underwear. I see pads

in her room. Is she flushing them down the toilet, she is amping up and saying it’s not

going to be good for me when you have a huge expensive plumbing bill. My daughter

had finished her period a whole week before we arrived at *****SILand was using

the empty packaging to store her undies washing. I had to make my daughter say to

her aunty my period finished a week before we got here. Later that evening my

daughter is crying in the room she staying in. It took a lot of convincing to SIL for

her to believe me, when i said we have never nor will ever flush pads and wet wipes in

the toilet. We didn’t do anything wrong at all. Daughter did use the half flush on the toilet

hence why 3 flushes. I asked SIL what makes it seems like it is going to block.

We have never blocked a toilet in our life.

The brother in law with FOMO turns up as fully stoned and very drunk, he ends up

going off the deep end and having full on argument with all of us. The trigger word for

this explosion was our govt . Later on he is talking to my daughter and

blowing her kisses and asks if he can hold her hand. She is just looking at him and

not talking at all, she is listening but not reciprocating. He said he would take her

anywhere if she wanted. He was very intoxicated. I asked my daughter to write on her

iPad when we went home 4 weeks later and she said she was very uncomfortable with her uncle saying these things and blowing her kisses.

Daughter does not have developed relations with her aunts and uncles. She is

comfortable with my sister but doesnt engage verbally. She is not non verbal though.

My husband siblings really dont know our daughter at all. Daughter just sits and stays in

her world in a public setting and doesn’t get into talking at all. She is 28 and loves

Nintendo and chocolate.

After the blow up about the toilet that never blocked. I became super vigilant and

hyper stressed. I was watching my every move. I could see my daughter doing the same.😔

It turns out SIL and her hubby were going to overseas on the

second week or our stay. We would be house and dog sitting. I still felt very anxious as

they have 4 survelliance cameras around the home and one in the laundry on the dog

feeder and it picks up voice. There is no cooking in the kitchen, there is a gas cooker outside. In the

cutlery drawer

the spoons and forks are stacked on top of each other perfectly. I cant breathe and I

am triggered. I am mad at her and i had to suck it up. I was in their home.

I dont like her right now. I had my own personal meltdown and was faking and fawning the whole

time, just to get through it.

My thoughts are intrusive and self loathing. I feel that she hates me and thinks my daughter is really disabled. I’m angry.

SIL and hubby had days pre planned while we were there so went to the local RSL ,

with other sister and husband. We had our own things to do so didn’t go.

My daughter came up in their dinner conversation and the stoned drunk brother and

his inappropriate behaviour. Not sure i am ok with this. they barely know our daughter

personally.

On another drinking night, these people drink every day, other sister and hubby were

leaving . I heard SIL’S husband behind me ask my daughter for a hug. My daughter’s room was

right next to SILs husband bedroom. I barely slept. When they went to overseas, we could breathe a

little.

I’m depressed again.

I’d appreciate any support