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Something’s not right

END OF THE ROAD?

NewLife58Casual Contributor

END OF THE ROAD?

Our story is so long & involved, I don’t know where to start. I only know there appears to be no answers in our mental health system for someone with Long Term Complex Mental Health. He refuses to access help due to a traumatic experience with mental health ED 18 years ago.
I’m the mother of this 42 yr old adult male who has been unwell for 25 years.
I’m now struggling to hold my own mental, physical & financial life together, due to trying to support him over all those years. All other family members gave up years ago.
I’m beside myself knowing I can no longer keep up with this life of chaos, financial pressure & no answers.
How do I reconcile with myself & my values by having to walk away from a person with an altered perspective of reality. I’m devastated, my heart is broken.

I feel I’m leaving him to die to save myself.
Has any parent out there managed to get through this ordeal?

6 replies

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In response to: END OF THE ROAD?

Ru-beeModerator

Re: END OF THE ROAD?

Hi @NewLife58

I see that you're looking to connect with others who can share their own similar experiences, and while I can't speak from my own lived experience, I did want to stop by and welcome you to the forums. I know it can be so hard to reach out somewhere new and discuss such difficult topics and choices, but it sounds as though you're doing what you need to do to keep yourself above water right now.

I'm wondering whether you have any supports who you've been able to lean throughout this?

In response to: Re: END OF THE ROAD?

NewLife58Casual Contributor

Re: END OF THE ROAD?

Hi,
Yes, I’ve tried various supports. Psychiatrist, Psychotherapist, local GP. I cant seem to move past the fog & blur atm.

In response to: Re: END OF THE ROAD?

ElephantEar3Senior Contributor

Re: END OF THE ROAD?

Hi @NewLife58

I just want to share this site in relation to your post. Its great that you've had some professional help so maybe this is the next step for you?

carersaustralia.com.au/support-for-carers/carer-gateway/

Carers Australia has lots of resources that may or may not be helpful but thought I'd share just in case you hadn't come across it before.

In response to: END OF THE ROAD?

SugarshackSenior Contributor

Re: END OF THE ROAD?

Do what you need to do to find happiness in your later years. You have looked after this person for so long, they are middle aged now and seems they havent had the capacity to improve. Yet, you desere to see your twilight years coming to peace with your own life, having some quality time, getting things done which you want and need to do.

My own brother has long term complex mental health needs and it has killed me to see my Mum stuck in a vicious cycle of abusive father, abusive husband, a son that never got off the ground and abuses her every day. She has lost everything and many good people in life but she clings onto "her life as a mother". I would love to see my mum slam the door on my brother and seize the day to have some happiness in life. Where does your road to liberty begin?

In response to: Re: END OF THE ROAD?

NewLife58Casual Contributor

Re: END OF THE ROAD?

Thank you for your insight and perspective. 🌺

In response to: Re: END OF THE ROAD?

NewLife58Casual Contributor

Re: END OF THE ROAD?

Thank you
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