Struggletown.

So I’m over 50, diagnosed ADHD last year and I now realise how little support I’ve had from early childhood.
It’s been a struggle my entire life, with relationships, friends, family and work.
I’ve taken on everything head on that life has shown, but it’s always been done alone.
I struggle to ask for help, because that’s weakness right 😞

I have attempted 3 times, the last one was on Sunday and the most devastating .. not just for me, but my wife & son saw me too.

I guess I’m lucky I was talked through this last one, but now I’m being told “go get the help you need” while keeping her distance from me.
When what I truly need from my wife right now is connection, support love and understanding.
I get it was a scary night, however I feel like I’m already building a wall up again to keep myself safe from this feeling that is already building of being alone.
I know she will take weeks to be affectionate & intimate again with me, and I am craving the touch & closeness it brings us.

I have no idea how to do both together, give her time to process & feel connected to her again.
we already had a little argument about it last night, and I feel it’s getting further and further from happening.