Unknown userMember
Just a number
I'm just a number in a system that's overworked and run down, I wandered for awhile why I felt so unworthy of support to only find I'm not alone
I'm just another statistic of the system that has let not just me but others down, I've accepted that why all humans who walk through the door aren't treated justly is unknown
There's no closure there, no battle to be had, no fight to try, and make my voice feel heard will ever make it through the chaos of overwhelm and demand
I have learnt that it's not an individualised experience and not a reflection of health care alone and the only way to see change is to get the hierarchy to understand
The problem is getting to that level as you are pushed to the side from the powers underneath, if you don't fit a criteria you are a medical mystery
If they can't put an exact diagnosis or definitive resolve you are left to fend alone, if trained professionals can't support you then the chance for help gets slippery
We are in a first world country and yes we have so many things to hold gratitude for, however I would trade a lot right now for some kind of resolve
Some kind of hope that I'm not left to be my own healer and rely on google to find healing, the battle is relentless and I can't help but feel the hope dissolve
I am only but a number and if I find some kind of way to get healing I would, I don't want this standard of quality to be the expected for my life
I have fought though and tried but been met only with defeat, so I will have to accept maybe this is as good as it gets, and I can't make all the wrongs right