Protection

Yes it is okay to step away from your 40 year old child @Valiant83 . You come first in this.

Do you mean Borderline Personality Disorder?

The diagnosis was Personality Disorder Type B - antisocial, borderline, histrionic, and narcissistic - which he exhibits to varying degrees in between periods of recognisable behaviours - I’m still learning what it all means even though he’s had the diagnosis for about 18mths

That's a tough one @Valiant83 . I'm hopping off now, but I hope to chat tomorrow evening - this time, from the perspective of someone with live experience of a personality disorder. And yes, to this day, the best thing is for my loved ones to have set boundaries with me - to protect themselves. I can't recommend this more.

You need to care for yourself.

How are you today @Valiant83 ?

hi @tyme - much better day today ... at work and had some tough conversations with staff and stakeholders ... feel like I managed myself well in those and reached some strong conclusions with responsibility and actions being appropriately accepted ... and now I'm online to provide myself with an alternative to buying a bottle of wine before heading home ... a new strategy for better self-care!

Good on you @Valiant83 . Making progress isn't always easy, but then again, things worth fighting for aren't easy either.

Your strength and determination shines through. Well done on focusing on your own self-care. Set and stick to those boundaries. At the same time, communicate them with your son so he knows what to expect. e.g. "When you are angry, I going to walk away. You can message me when you have calmed down and are ready to talk".... then walk off. It's hard at first, but you need to protect yourself.

It is tough and it's having something else to do so as not to get sucked back into the drama of his situation ... hence being here instead of just getting into the car and driving home ... he doesn't live with me BTW ... it's the empty house I'm avoiding!! Anyway, best get on the road and get a good night's sleep after a big day 😊

Thanks for checking in! Appreciate that 😄

Hey @Valiant83 ,

There is always someone online here.

Please know you are not alone. We love your company and want to support you through this. Please continue to look after yourself. You deserve it.

Thanks @tyme ☺️

@Valiant83 I think stepping away is very wise, as it will also allow him time to calm down. Engaging while he is in a PD episode (seems like rage in this instance) will actually make the problem worse. It is hard to step away when things are heightened, but it is definitely a wise choice.