Panic attacks

Hi @mrkotter.

So sorry things have got difficult but congrats on the new girlfriend I have no idea how to help as I don't really understand panic attacks much but I wondered what would happen if you just said that regardless you have to slow down or stop for a day or two. I also don't work or know what line of business you are in but it seems from a naive outside point of view that what's the point of burning yourself out? Can you just put yourself first so you can maintain a better sense of control and stability?

Thanks @Former-Member. That's not naive, it's good advice. I just really struggle with perspective and putting myself first. Generally, my answer to problems at work is to just work harder. It's automatic and I don't know how I'm going to change it.

Maybe working harder all the time helped you to get to this place in your recovery @mrkotter but now it is time to slow a little so you can maintain your level of mental health and enjoy parts of life again. Don't ask me how to do that in the real world but it seems like you have done so well to get to this point it would seem a shame to throw it away.

I'm just editing my last post @mrkotter. I was very tired and not thinking clearly. I'm sorry. You never implied throwing it away. That was my fear based projection. I just see you've got a lot going on and it feels like it's time to live a bit as well. Easy for me to sit here and write this while I'm not living any of it. Stay strong @mrkotter. I'm sure you will work it out. I hope you get a response from someone living your situation a bit more.

Hearing that you have a new girlfriend just made my Monday morning @mrkotter! That's wonderful news.

Work certainly sounds like an unsustainable situation. One that you're likely be struggling with even without your diagnosis. I think you hit the nail on the head with 'I need to find a way to say no to things at work'. It's a point many of us need to get to. Where being a highly valued employee starts to come at too high a price and we need to negotiate expectations and demands back to a reasonable point.

After my spectacular burnout 15 years ago I've become quite militant about it. I won't push myself too far anymore and I have a physical reminder of that burnout that helps to keep me on track. It's never worth it. Even with the best job, we're all replaceable so there's no point joining the walking wounded over it.

Do you think the panic is a response to the heightened level of threat the workload/risk has created? If that's the case, then all the normal stress control strategies like exercise, breath work etc will be like swimming against the current. You'll make some headway but not necessarily enough.

Is there room to negotiate the workload now? Or to take a couple of mental health days? And if not, are you really sure the answer is no? Are these unrealistic expectations really worth your health? Or your new relationship?

From the way you've talked about your work in the past I can see that it's important to you so I'm not making these suggestions lightly. And certainly not imaging that it's easy to step back. But panic attacks are a very strong sign that this isn't sustainable.

What are your thoughts today?

Hello @Former-Member

This morning was rough but tonight I realised I was in a catch-22 situation for a major bit of work so strangely enough I was able to shrug it all off and I feel better for it. I get your points - especially a lot of the usual techniques won't work. It is a reaction to the level of intensity at work. At the moment I'm relying on anti-anxiety medication, which isn't a good thing because of the side effects. Especially in a new relationship if you catch my drift.

I'm running again so that's a lot better for me. I take what you said but running is such a routine now I feel lost without it (sort of its own source of stress I guess). And I did say today that I am heading towards burnout so that's a first step. I don't really want to take time off - it's bad but I'm okish. I would feel worse taking time off because the entire team is under the pump and someone would need to take up the slack. I talked to most of my team today and we are all feeling the same way. I think if I stick to some rules I should be ok.

But if it does get worse I will take time off. It definitely not worth my health or a relationship. It's been hard to keep them from crossing over.

Now onto the exciting stuff. Yeah she's pretty cool. Fun to be around. Dating has been a lot of fun. And Sydney is such a great place for it - it's so easy to come up with amazing ideas. Oh and the pillow talk is just f*cking amazing. It's like a D&M on steroids. I never saw that coming.

I joined Sane for a topic Tuesday to talk about that. Thanks for your advice that night @Former-Member. Between you and my psychologist I kicked a massive goal this year and I'm very happy because of that.

I am sorry work is stressing you to the point of panic @mrkotter Office politics can get tricky, but you sound like you are working out your boundaries about how much to give .. in the workplace ..

I got called "walking wounded" by a lady in the choir. I was shocked at the time but it was 8 years ago and was a fair call. I try and carry it with dignity, like a vet. I am pretty self reliant, but no need for any one to join these ranks by pushing themselves. Take care. There is always pain and needy people in the world.

Glad you are enjoying a new relationship.

I enjoy your posts and interactions with mods. All good grist for the mill.

I had panic attack in the big shopping centre....it's big one I won't mention which one but it's very big

I have been here before and felt alright but on Sunday when I went to 2nd floor then I had attack..

At the time of the attack I wanted to 'escape' - to go downstairs or leave the place but a short time later I felt better when I got to the clothing shop.

I was not by myself and the other person said it's due to sugar level in blood...after eating may feel

dizzy but I think there is more to it than that...

I didn't sit down ...I kept walking

Have you had similar experience of wanting to 'escape' ?

I didn't get good sleep so that was one thing ..the other thing is I struggle with 'unwanted' thoughts....