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Something’s not right

Could it be psychosis?

Could it be psychosis?

So I did some training earlier this week that made me realise that a lot of the things I've been contributing to my anxiety might not be explained by just that. And I think I knew that a bit, I don't talk about them and I've only told one phycologist a little about it. I mentioned that when I get very anxious I feel like there's bugs in my arms and I have some scars from trying to scratch them out in the past. She then asked a question around psychosis and I desmissed it by says I know it's just the nerves in my arms but that's hard to remember when having a panic attack. That was a couple of months ago and I didn't really think about it again until the training this week, it had a section on supporting people who are pre-psychosis and experiencing psychosis. When my anxiety gets bad I have trouble driving by myself because I keep thinking that other cars are following me and at night I have trouble convincing myself that there isn't anyone in the back seat so I have to keep checking. I also see little shadow creatures out of the corner of my eye a lot, in the past I've just dismissed that as something that happens to everyone but probably not as much as it happens to me. After writing all that down I feel like it's obvious that I should actually look into getting support and that's what I'd encourage someone who told me something similar to do. I just feel like I'm overthinking it, "it's just anxiety" or "that happens to everyone and you're just trying to be special" or "you're making this bigger than it is"

I know I should mention it to my psychologist. I've already used 5 of my appointments for this year so only have 5 left and I don't know if my current psychologist has experience with psychosis so I'm unsure how helpful she'll be with such limited appointments. I know that my mental health is currently declining and I was already worrying about what I was going to do once I ran out of Medicare rebate appointments, I can afford the gap but I don't think I'll be about to afford the full cost more once in a month or two. I've seen quite a few mental health professionals over the years but the only one that was helpful was one I saw each week for like 8 months. I don't have the option of going back to that service as I'm no longer youth.

I just don't know what to do and feel like I'm making a mountain out of a mole hill.

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In response to: Could it be psychosis?

Re: Could it be psychosis?

Hi and welcome @LostBee

It's good to have you here 😊
I'm hearing a lot is going on for you, and you've taken the step to share about it here, thank you for sharing.

It sounds like you are in a space where you want to get support and its a bit tricky with your current psychologist but also it sounds like you are telling yourself that you don't need extra support! I have definitely been in that space where I almost gaslight myself out of my struggles. What whats behind this..

I wanted to share some supports as it seems that is something you are considering:

I also wonder if speaking about it with your current psychologist might be helpful for the short term (5 sessions) and they may be able to assist moving forward on what your options can be?

Let us know how you go 🙂 You are not alone and we are here to support 💛

Sending lots of light,

fluffylight

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