I'm nervous about my upcoming shift

Hey @Pippa4 totally legit that you're feeling so nervous, going back to work after so long. Would feel very uncomfortable indeed. Is your workplace supportive in terms of mental health stuff? Would they be able to support you if you needed say, an extra break or to focus on work that isn't interacting with customers?

Can be so hard to have intrusive, dark thoughts. You said yourself that you can't control them, so perhaps it isn't about getting through the shift without having them, and more about practicing not listening to them or letting them overwhelm you throughout the day.

I also found a couple of pdf worksheets online about coping with intrusive thoughts, you can find them here and here.

Do you have mental health supports in place? Worrying that others might be able to read your mind would be a very distressing experience, and something that could be worth chatting to a MH professional about.

Remember, you are not your thoughts. If a dark thought comes in, and your reaction to it is to be horrified, that tells you more about who you are than the presence of the thought in the first place. It's a very normal, human thing to have dark thoughts, and they don't make you a bad person at all.

Hi @Pippa4 , how did your shift go yesterday? Really hope it went better then you expected...

Hi @NatureLover my shift yesterday was terrible.
I had all these awful thoughts while serving the customers and I was losing focus on what I was doing because of these thoughts.
I tried to stay at the back, away from the customers, as much as possible.

I know they are just thoughts and I don’t say these thoughts out loud but it causes me a lot of distress.

Oh no, @Pippa4 , sorry to hear 😢

Can you practice not listening to the awful thoughts, like @Jynx said above? Very hard, I know 😣

And do you have any professional support? Like a counsellor, meds, psychologist or psychiatrist? To help with the distress you feel?

Sending good wishes...

@NatureLover

I could practice not listening to these awful thoughts and try not to let it affect me mentally.

I did another 5 hour shift yesterday and I still had the same silly thoughts running through my head. I tried to move past it because I know they are just thoughts, and our thoughts are private. No one can read our thoughts and I'm not saying these thoughts out loud. They remain inside my head. I thought being at work will help distract me from having these bad thoughts because I will be busy concentrating on what I'm doing but it hasn't.

I have a psychologist that I see every 6 weeks. She hasn't really given me any helpful tips though of how to deal with these thoughts.

I'm currently taking an antidepressant and two antipsychotic medications to help with my symptoms of psychosis.

I've also got support from a psychiatrist that I see every 6 weeks to check in and see how I'm going.

I think the key to distract me from my thoughts is to keep busy and somehow stop thinking haha but I'm an overthinker so it's really hard.

Hi @Jynx

My boss at my workplace is completely supportive and understandable as they had someone that they know go through a similar thing. They are extremely caring and they will allow me to take an extra break or sit down if I need to, yes or course. They is a back area I can work on that doesn't involve serving customers so if I can do that and work at the back, that will be good. Thanks for the great idea and help.

Thanks for sending through the worksheets with coping with intrusive thoughts. I will find that extremely helpful.

Yeah, I have a psychologist that I see every 6 weeks, but she hasn't really given me any tips on how to deal with intrusive thoughts. All she suggests is to keep busy. I also have a psychiatrist that i see every 6 weeks as well. I also have my general GP that I see.

I need to practice ignoring my thoughts and not letting it affect me mentally.