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This too shall pass, or will it?

LostSoul2New Contributor27 June 2023, 10:28 pm AEST

This too shall pass, or will it?

I have struggled with depression for years, since I was a teenager really. For a while I was in denial. 'You'll be fine', I'd tell myself. 'Get over it' 'Stop faking it' 'You're just a useless waste of space' 'You'll never amount to anything'. I know we have all told ourselves those words, and for a little moment in time, believed them.

Except I did amount to something. I have the career that I spent 10 years studying for. I have the man of my dreams and in September, I'm going to marry him. I have the support of friends and family, both blood and inherited. It's not a grand amount of something, but it's not nothing.

But what if it's not enough?

I've spent 10 years studying to get the career, only I'm not good at the job anyway.

I'm marrying the man of my dreams in September, only I can't help thinking about the cost and the stress of planning.

I have supportive family and friends, only they have no idea how I'm feeling.

I amounted to something, only I have never felt so empty.

This too shall pass, only maybe it won't.

3 replies

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In response to: This too shall pass, or will it?

Unknown userMember27 June 2023, 11:23 pm AEST

Re: This too shall pass, or will it?

Hi @LostSoul2

I hope it will pass.

You know your successes

You have support.

Can family organuse the wedding or does it have to be so elaborate if it stresses you.

Maybe aim for a great fun wedding instead of 100% perfect. Allow for a few things that may not be exaclty as you think. Others will not know.

If you are not sure of yourself, others will worry.

I was a tradesman. Now l do something else. So if you do not like the job, at least you qualified.

Worry about that after the wedding

September is not far away

In response to: This too shall pass, or will it?

NatureLoverSenior Contributor28 June 2023, 7:56 am AEST

Re: This too shall pass, or will it?

Welcome @LostSoul2 , and congratulations on all you have achieved despite your depression.

I'm wondering if you have any professional support for your depression? Like a counsellor, meds, psychologist or psychiatrist?

An important forum tip is if you type @ and then click on a name in the drop-down box, that person will get a notification and won't miss your reply.

I hope you find the forums supportive...

In response to: This too shall pass, or will it?

OwlunarSenior Contributor28 June 2023, 4:47 pm AEST

Re: This too shall pass, or will it?

Hi @LostSoul2

Planning a wedding is a major stressor - changing your marital status is too - and as @Former-Member said - other people can do the organising if this is what would help? And whether you get married or not - this too will pass.

As for 10 years of study for your career - believe me - whatever else happens in your life 10 years study is never a waste - you have been exposed to ideas - impressions - thoughts - different realities - this will always be a good thing even if you don't follow the profession you chose.

I have never regretted one moment of all the years of study I did - they were - are - life enhancing.

But your depression is a different issue - that is harder to deal with - we have to learn what's causing the depression and find help to deal with it - that's the place to start sorting out what will and won't pass - for me - depression was reactive - it wasn't easy dealing with the cause - in time it did pass - and I gained from the lessons learned.

So basically - all you have done - study, plan a marriage - experienced depression - as tough as all of this has been it will serve you well - whatever path you choose. Imo life is about learning - and you will never lose that.

I do understand though - this is an uncertain time - depression is tough, you have found your chosen career was not for you and marriage - it's a big deal and you need to make decisions.

Life can be a tough road but yes - I do wish you the best - I am really glad you have reached out to us - I would like to welcome you to the forum

Owlunar

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