I dont want to be a broken record

Hi @ClockFace

I have been following journey.

I think the pain was bearable as the oain killing drugs were still in your system.

Sounds like pain since they have warn off.

Did they say 6 weeks until you feel better?

If so, 6 weeks is a long time, but happy to hear your updates

Hi @ClockFace

Another day closer to the 6 week time frame.

I hope you slept well.

I hope the free health gets you through. Our health system seems better than Usa.

But we never know until we rely on it.

You are not a broken record.

You are actively seeking treatment.

I hope your day goes well

@ClockFace I don't think you are a broken record just by expressing that you feel you are getting nowhere/going backwards. You're allowed to feel that.

I'm sorry you can't seem to catch a break. Life is tough for so many and it's heartbreaking.

Hi @ClockFace

How are you feeling?

Any progress?

I am about to watch Masterchef.

How do you relax?

Hi @ClockFace

You're not being a broken record my friend - you have pain and there are those of us here have our own versions of the same sort of issues and know damn well that it is a bloody pain - please excuse my French - those words just seem applicable in this case.

With TMI - bladder issues - your totally numb leg and the degree of pain you have right now - it's my suggestion you get onto your surgeon about it - that sounds pretty serious to me - spinal issues are better attended to early rather than later. I really understand and care about that.

And your lack of family support and the sheer dysfunction of it all would not be helpful to you - I am glad I live alone with mine - I can please myself what I do and when and don't have to listen to other people sorting out other issues while ignoring mine. And boy - I really understand. I get it.

It's just hard work - and I know - chronic pain rarely gets cured - it can only be managed - there are some of us here who can support you by understanding - and someone has started a thread about chronic pain - it's early days yet - but it's started - and I took the chance to tag you in - you can add your story if you like - and once people start talking about their journey - other's will join - and maybe you won't feel so alone.

You are part of our family now - the Forum Family - you are one of us and in a virtual way - you belong to us and us to you

All the best

Owlunar

@Owlunar

Thanks. I did get in contact with the pain specialist/surgeon, he said that there is very likely a lot of inflamation so for now he isnt too worried about anything at the moment. Obviously its something to keep an eye on. Today my left leg isnt working great, I cant seem to lift it up when Im walking. I have control of it fine when Im sitting etc. Its just with walking.

I do appreciate all the support I get here. It means heaps to me. Im on here everyday and almost everyday I get a message of support.

Im working on a plan that hopefully will mean once my medical stuff has settled down I am able to move out. I can apply for a grant through work that will give me upto $5k to help me out. Im gonna look at a few other things that might mean I can have the bond and 2 weeks rent paid. Ive got to work out if thats going to be enough and if I can get a budget sorted where I can afford to move out and pay for all my medical costs. Essentially, I have to make all that work, I got to get out.

Hi again @ClockFace

I agree - you need to get away from your dysfunctional family - it is making things harder for you - and that's not good at all.

You have a lot of finances to work out - and it costs a lot to see a pain specialist - though Medicare refunds increase after you reach a certain limit. You need to consider private hospital insurance as well -- and there are other medical expenses to consider.

I am most certainly not trying to discourage you - as far as I know you are getting all this free in the public system. And that's fine - still - you need an income.

I know you have a job - do you think you will be able to return to work in the future? This is an important consideration. Perhaps you need to see if you are applicable for a Disability Support Pension - and this would help regardless of other expenses.

If you do have such a pension it does cut the cost of medication and you can apply for rent relief - I have been through all of that - so yes - I know all of this is something you need to check out. You don't have to answer my questions either - this is pretty private stuff and I am not prying - just making suggestions.

You do need to get your own place though - it is not healthy for you to stay where you are now - it's pretty obvious that you are way down on anyone else's priorities - for your dad - I think he's overwhelmed - still - his lack of support for you is his choice - and I guess the way things are - that's something to leave him with - let him deal with this alone - cause that's the only way we can run our lives anyway.

Your mother and sister though - that is just plain selfishness - and I get it - you feel you don't count and pretty much that sounds true - which is really not at all good for you.

I am glad you are planning to get out of that shambles of a family life - it won't be easy - I've have walked a similar road years and years ago - it is a hard decision to make - hopefully you will feel better without all this tension.

I do wish you the best - I write this a lot and I mean it. For you right now - I mean it even more

Owlunar

@Owlunar

I probably would have qualified for DSP in the past and I might still. My sister is on DSP. Ive been told by the family that Im not allowed to go on it.

Weird thing is, it would rather stay at work, I like it too much. It helps structure my day. It gives me purpose and a goal. It takes me away from home, like it forces me to change what Im focused on and I really enjoy it. My family wouldnt believe me if I said any of that to them, they think I dont want to work etc. but I do. Its important to me on so many levels.

Ive hit my PBS safety limit for the year so that will help and I wouldnt be far from hitting my medicare one.

I have private health, really good private health, its too important for me not to have it, if I was relying on the public system I probably still wouldnt know I have bladder cancer. Its so worthwhile to me as well, the amount I pay vs the amount they pay out each yeah, Im well ahead.

Finances are hard, Ive got a financial councillor who has been helping but moving out is a priority and its a must. Im not gonna survive otherwise

Hi @ClockFace

I am glad you are making plans and have some supports set up - you really do have to get out of your family - it's so toxic it can only make you worse.

I spent a little time today reading some more of what you have written - I am glad you are writing this and hope it helps you to do so - and really - I am shocked.

Your mother says you can't be on the DSP! That is not her decision - and if you can work - that's great - if you can't - then that's the way it is - it's not for your mother to say.

And I get it - my mother has been long gone - still - she would give me orders I ignored - after all - I have been living independently for a long time now and for a time I was dependent on the DSP then the Age Pension and I did manage.

I don't have anything to do with my siblings either - so - my toxic family broke apart - I am not sorry to be away from them.

It's not an easy path though - and still - all the best with that

Owlunar