Good,Bad,Ugly Day

Hi Friends Possibly another vent about the last 24 hours or so, Thank you for taking the time to Listen, Ok this is how today has been from start to finish ,this morning I was in an abnormally deep sleep on and off and each time I fell back into very deep sleep I dreamed strange dreams,and kept well just wanting to sleep ,no self harm involved or anything just so people are aware ,but I just kept staying in a deep state of sleep ,it was so hard to wake up from it ,like my mind and body just wanted to stay in a deep dream like sleep even when trying to wake up ,which I did eventually wokeup ,but Almost fell over as was unsteady on feet ,side note I have not Taken anything out of the normal to feel this strange and this drowsy apon waking up ,anyway I auto pilot to the hot shower hoping that will wake me up which it did to an extent,then stated on housework ,washing,vaccuming ect while still a little in a sleep like state even though it was day time and I should be fully awake and fully alert , anyway as The day went on I had times of feeling kind of a little too self confident but other times less self confident,was also unuasually focussed on my outward apperance of hair,face ect looking nice, also Was stressed about study assignments that Im still behind on,worked on some of that throughout the day on and off while listening to relaxing music,maybe felt anxcious at times throughout day my thoughts kept fluctuating from really happy to not very happy at all,but seemed to overall function in getting the daily things done,Called a family member, which turned out to be very helpfull, but then I started to feel worried ,almost teary and sad for my romantic partner having to put up with me ,maybe Im not very good to him ect thoughts like that as if he why does he put up with me,Im selfish,He deserves better than me ect,these thoughts came with guilt as earlier today as waking Id messaged him in my deep sleep like state while my eyes where open and may have not considered his feelings and thoughts properly and later felt that in some way I may have been selfish ,inconsiderate and self absorbed,and I guess skipping to later than that was looking at his photos and kind of feeling bad for him even though he hasnt said anything about my selfishness or inconsideration this morning ,skip to now and I guess Ill take a break from stressing about study and just try to relax by watching a movie of some sort or maybe more relaxing music before bed,I have eaten food throughout the day so it couldnt be from low blood sugar or anything like that I dont know anyaway thank you to whover can understand being in a sleep like state when your awake