Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

47,612Members
1,358,869Posts
1,400,000Visitors

Persecution complex

justanotherguySenior Contributor25 Feb 2023, 6:24 am AEDT

Persecution complex

I'll put this up here but I already know what's going to happen.

For the last several years I have been not convinced of my 'mental illness' diagnosis. I had a great chat with my therapist yesterday and said that when I feel most 'normal' is when those around me hound me the most to get treatment. It makes no sense. So I've been trying to work out for years what's happening.

There is no doubt I had some psychosis years ago when coming home from overseas but when diagnosed with my psychotic illness I was actually not too bad, most of the psychosis had passed. Basically all my recollections of what has happened over the past 20 years have been refuted, firstly by family but now by friends and all sorts of people. I was struggling with something I did many years ago but even the other people involved are denying recollection of it happening, my family says I am making it up, and when I told a long-term friend he questions my sanity because of my 'psychosis'. The whole situation is laughable.

So if I'm sane, then why is this happening? Over many years I think my family has been driven out of town where I grew up. We've been picked off one by one, starting with a relative back at school, but the pattern of psychological attack is now far too obvious. My 'friend' has been trying to convince me to move overseas for several years, and on medication is seemed like a good idea, but now it makes no sense. He knows I'm a homebody and don't want to travel.

To be continually beaten into the ground by society and those you love takes a toll. My family were a bit eccentric but never did anything wrong, we had a lot of fun in life. But for me to try and go to police with a story like this, well you can imagine where I'd end up. You realise it's just not worth the hassle, if literally everyone you know is against you. It's unfortunate my family have been swept up in this as they think everything is my fault and are constantly trying to undermine my own sanity, probably because they are trying to save their own hides.

If people are willing to destroy you to get their hands on something (in my case I think it's just land, that's all) then who am I to try and stop them? I have no dependents so can't see the point in fighting against this situation. I just like the area and thought I'd end up living around there for the rest of my life. I'm not a bad person, and that's the whole point, people with 'mental illnesses' are usually good people at heart who struggle with bad situations.

2 replies

1 - 2 of 2

In response to: Persecution complex

AppleblossomSenior Contributor25 Feb 2023, 10:22 am AEDT

Re: Persecution complex

Hey again @justanotherguy

I am not big on boundaries as a solve all issue, but wondering if there are enmeshment issues and that firming up interpersonal boundaries can help. Between you and your family and friends and neighbours. Ha ha I am one to talk, I am hopeless with boundaries and tend to yearn and hope and merge and turn myself into a pretzel to fit in. So learning about and talking about boundaries is a new thing for me. Mostly I believe in building brides not putting up walls ... yet when others have too much influence or power, we need to firm up the level we can trust them or let them in. Eg your friend, who does not seem to have your best interests at heart. I A lot of people need to grow roots like plants and do not like being moved.

I do believe it can be a dog eat dog world, and that people can be easily pushed to the margins which may be what happened to your family socially. Not sure how eccentric they are, but taking you at face value, and guessing you are regional, I accept they did nothing seriously wrong to feel excluded. However country towns had a bad name for being a bit like that, not sure if they have grown better or not.

You still have some trust and understanding of your family, even though they seem to also blame you. A metaphor come to mind of how people who are drowning might fight over the log rather than all hanging on together. Maybe there is a bit of that going on in your family. Not sure. One fellow I knew with schizophrenia, did blame his family and drug taking for his condition, and kept pointing out how parents or older siblings can cause problems. Each person and family has its own drama dynamics, only you can tell.

Glad you have land to feel you have your own patch. No good to feel people trying to push you off it.

Persecution complex is a fairly old term. I used to hear it tossed around a lot, but not so much recently.

I am only recently going through all the logical and analytical steps around who I let in my front door. Front doors are another thing most people can take for granted, but I could not.

I see you grappling with the whole question of madness and context. I believe it is the right way to go.

In response to: Re: Persecution complex

justanotherguySenior Contributor25 Feb 2023, 11:59 am AEDT

Re: Persecution complex

@Appleblossom

"turn myself into a pretzel to fit in." Yes, I understand.

Sadly country towns seem to be getting more and more superstitious, inbred and hysterical as they are homogenised. There used to be a definite mix of people in most towns but it's not the case anymore as most have worked out the secret to success and apply it well. It's just sometimes you're on the losing side of history and have to accept that. At least there are no lynch mobs yet. If I survive all this it might make a good telemovie drama on ABC TV one day.

1 - 2 of 2