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Drained

ClockFaceSenior Contributor12 Feb 2023, 6:45 pm AEDT

Drained

My sister has been in multiple hospitals for a bit over 2 months now. She is finally in a mental health facility. I have been going in pretty much every day, few days missed but she is unable to comprehend what doctors are saying or retain information so I am acting as her carer/advocate. I was running pretty low, drained, exhusted. I also have mental health issues which this is affecting. So I took a day off which for a range of reasons turned to 3 days. I needed to do some stuff for myself and my Dad went in for the day so I thought good opportunity to regroup.

I went in today to see her, it was difficult, she is hard to follow and talk to. It is really hard and tiring. I left and was just exhusted again. I feel like I cant get my strength back, I just want to sleep (struggling to do that). I dont know how to keep supporting her without going down a really big hole myself. Dad cant go down except on weekends and is no good with mental health. Mum doesnt leave her room.

To add to the stress I have stopped being paid by work (on leave due to mental health and my sister) This was expected and my Dad said we would sort it out. He knows its stopped now, I have medical costs and bills that need to be paid. My medical costs mean I live pay to pay. Added to that I have been doing thosands of Kms to be with my sister. So far he has avoided the topic, changed subject etc. I want to talk to him and my Mum as Mum has offered to help but not committed. Cant seem to do it and its getting pretty dire.

3 replies

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In response to: Drained

tymeModerator12 Feb 2023, 8:30 pm AEDT

Re: Drained

Hey @ClockFace ,

I'm sorry to hear how challenging it is for everyone at the moment - mental health wise, relationship wise and financially.

Do you have supports in place for yourself?

I'm wondering if you'd be interested in SANE guided service which you may be eligible based on your postcode. You are welcome to have a look here: https://www.sane.org/referral

I hope you get the support you need so that you can then be a support to your family.

I look forward to hearing how you go.

tyme

In response to: Re: Drained

ClockFaceSenior Contributor13 Feb 2023, 9:29 am AEDT

Re: Drained

Im currently waiting for my welcome call. The person who was supposed to call was sick and just waiting for it to be reschedualed. Thanks

In response to: Drained

FloatingFeatherSenior Contributor13 Feb 2023, 3:35 pm AEDT

Re: Drained

Hi @ClockFace,

You are going through so much - I'm really sorry this is happening to you, you must be exhausted both physically and mentally.

This is a lot for one person to deal with and for so long. I know you said your parents had limited ability to help - is there another family member (i.e. cousin, family friend, etc) that can help visit your sister to and share the load? If, that is not possible, is there someone that could at least support you with what you are going through?

Would you consider reaching out to an organisation such as the Salvation Army, St Vincent de Paul Society, your local church / community centre. They may be able to help with food vouchers, transport vouchers etc.

- Salvation Army

- St Vincents

I would also encourage you to get support for yourself. You also need someone to talk to and support you. As a carer I get what is like when you have to be mindful around family and the person you are caring about but you need to be able to vent and express yourself with someone not emotionally in the situation. Here are a couple of organisations that may be able to help you:

- Carers Australia

- Carer Gateway

I really hope things ease up for you and your family very soon.

Warm wishes,

FloatingFeather

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