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TW: Self-harm, SI and drug dependancy

Loz_3647Senior Contributor04 Jan 2023, 8:19 pm AEDT

TW: Self-harm, SI and drug dependancy

I suffer from MDD, Anxiety, C-PTSD and BPD. I am also dealing with with withdrawing from medications so im finding myself supplementing it with other things. I am not coping very well at all. I've got racing thoughts and it's such a dark place to be. I'm finding more and more that I don't want to be here anymore. I feel like I've lost myself and like I have absolutely no purpose. I spoke with someone recently about these thoughts (not an online service) and I just don't see how I can get through this. I feel so alone and isolated. All I can see is a really dark path. All I can think about is ending things for good. I've lost all hope. I feel so worthless and like this world would not miss me. I feel like I cause so many problems. I am numb inside and so empty. There's no use anymore...

4 replies

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In response to: TW: Self-harm, SI and drug dependancy

wellwellwellnezSenior Contributor05 Jan 2023, 12:21 am AEDT

Re: TW: Self-harm, SI and drug dependancy

Hearing your pain @Loz_3647 .

I hope you're also taking the time to count your wins. I know you have them. I'm getting familiar with how strong you are. It gives me increasing certainty that you're pulling all kinds of feats of power.

Having said that, warriors still need cavalry. I'm getting the sense of some real frustration with your mental health plan. Does this mean the plan should change or is this one of those things where you're supposed to stay the course, till things get better? That's probably a hard question but still seems important. Wouldn't surprise me if it was a bit of both.

In response to: TW: Self-harm, SI and drug dependancy

amber22Senior Contributor05 Jan 2023, 1:48 pm AEDT

Re: TW: Self-harm, SI and drug dependancy

Hey there @Loz_3647

I'm sitting with you while you are feeling like this ❤️

I'm glad that you were able to speak with someone in person about this, but I am sorry that you didn't feel as if it was a clear path for your recovery. It can take time to find the right support for you, so please don't give up on this journey of finding the right health professional for you. Do you currently have a mental health plan, or have you spoken about how you are feeling with a psychologist, or a doctor that could refer you to someone?

There is also a drop in line here at SANE that you could give a call if you wanted to chat about how you are feeling.

All the best,

Amber22

In response to: TW: Self-harm, SI and drug dependancy

3_DHDCasual Contributor05 Jan 2023, 8:06 pm AEDT

Re: TW: Self-harm, SI and drug dependancy

If you're posting this here, that means you still have a flicker of hope still alive inside of you. It may not be easy, but when come out the other side of this step by step, a better life waits for you. When you're in such a dark place (I've been there...) it feels impossible to see past it. I promise you that things can get better. Keep that flame alive-sending love ❤️

In response to: TW: Self-harm, SI and drug dependancy

David_888Senior Contributor06 Jan 2023, 8:24 pm AEDT

Re: TW: Self-harm, SI and drug dependancy

@Loz_3647

It takes effort to combat the forces which go against us.

That's why something which motivates is is so important.

I think everyone gets tired. And they do like the Pharaohs and work to build a tomb.

But I think they also have sparks of motivation in between to combat the things that go against us.

I'm universally optimistic. Everything is here and with.

People just get tired.

It's okay to feel tired.

Try to rely on your Pharoahs instincts when you do.

*hug*

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