Why do I struggle with impatience and worry

Hi @utopia,

I also struggle with impatience and I think that in my case it's related to anxiety. I feel very uncomfortable when things are unresolved. I think it has a lot to do with the need to be in control at all times- because as an anxious person, being in control of situations can reduce anxiety... to an extent.

But the effect is only ever temporary, unfortunately. I will soon find myself getting anxious about something else, when one situation is under my control!

Things that make me impatient:- Slow internet connections, waiting for an email reply, waiting at traffic lights to cross the road, waiting the rain to stop hammering down, waiting for someone who is running late; the list goes on!

When I feel like this, I feel very frustrated. It's a good opportunity to practice using CBT. Just think; what's the worse that can happen if I don't get an the email response I'm expecting today? What if I do have to wait a full 5 minutes before I can cross the road? What will that change? Will the day be ruined?

If I challenge myself, I see that my anxiety is needless. Everyone experiences delays, they are simply part of life. I can use that time to relax, take deep breaths and look about and enjoy the moment. I can experience just being, instead of always doing.

I think it's really all about learning to sit with life's uncertainties. Learning that we are not always in control of everything and it's perfectly ok. We don't always need to be in control, all the time. We can just let life unfold as it will.

Hi @utopia

I am not sure if this is exactly what you mean but I find that when I am impatient it is because i am worried about the outcome including worried that i will expect something positive and something negative will happen, so wether the outcome is to be good or bad I just want to know now so that I can deal with it and i dont have to sit with uncertainty

and thats where i find the challenge, sitting with what i dont know and finding some belief in myself that i can deal with it no matter what - mindfulness is my favorite tool for working with this, not for everyone but I value it

me three

Hi @utopia, 100% count me in. Yes I use Mindfulness to help me. I also use three words to help me think of way to calm myself. Unconditional Positive Regard. Think of the situation that is making you impatient, think of the condition of situation ( is it going to really make a difference if you get impatient or not) bring some positivity to the situations, e.g. can I turn the rain of at the tap. is it really going to matter if it rains all day, the grass and plants will love it, the tanks will fill up.

Deep breathing is a must (mindfulness). Distract the mind with other things around you. e.g. What can you hear, see, smell, taste, feel?

I think most of us how suf anxiety and depression do it. I have also been told it is a star sign thing.