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I’m back, it’s been a while, it’s a struggle

RazzleSenior Contributor

I’m back, it’s been a while, it’s a struggle

It’s been a while since I have been on this site, a year? Maybe 2?

My life has changed in a big way the last few years. After my father died, which brought up a whole lot of buried memories and emotions that led me to this site, I got professional help and started to feel better. Life wasn’t perfect but I was feeling like I was making some progress. Covid hit and the professional help ceased.

A few years ago I moved into my mums house and became her full time carer as her dementia had progressed to the point she couldn’t care for herself. Long story short it was a tough few years, watching your mum slowly die and forget everyone and everything she’s ever known is excruciating. She passed away in May.

Since then I have moved home and as an executor in her Will I have been sorting that stuff out. One of my brothers is also an executor and he has turned everyone’s life upside down.

He has hijacked the Will, destroyed any kind of a relationship with myself and my other 2 brothers, done some real dodgy $hit regarding trying to buy my parents house, lied and scammed and cheated…. It’s a long story, and it’s all been for nothing as he has now pulled out of the sale.

It’s completely opened my eyes to what an absolute narcissist he is, how have I never noticed it before.

I’m back to having extreme anxiety, my stress levels are off the charts, flash backs have started as well as nightmares. My hubby woke me a week ago as I was screaming in my sleep. I feel physically sick ALL THE TIME.

I feel like I’m in flight or fight mode. My phone rings or I get a message I start to panic as I think it could be

my brother. I’ve seriously considered just jumping in my car and leaving, everyone and everything behind me but then I realise how I feel is just going to follow me anyway.

I cry whenever I’m alone, I’m tired all the time, I have no motivation to leave the house. Everything is just so hard, I feel like I’m back to square one, right where I was when I found this site years ago. I’m getting no where.

7 replies

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In response to: I’m back, it’s been a while, it’s a struggle

Shaz51Senior Contributor

Re: I’m back, it’s been a while, it’s a struggle

Hello and welcome back @Razzle , It is soo good to see you again my friend

Have been thinking of you many times

Sitting with you and letting you know that you are not alone here xxx

In response to: Re: I’m back, it’s been a while, it’s a struggle

tymeModerator

Re: I’m back, it’s been a while, it’s a struggle

Hey @Razzle ,

I'm so sorry to hear all this is happening at the moment.

I grieves my heart when I hear people fighting over matters concerning wills... I cringed when I once heard someone say they were waiting for XXX to pass so that they would get an inheritance...

I'm sorry to read of your brother's actions - it seems so wrong.

Do you have supports in place for yourself?

You are welcome to have a read through https://www.sane.org/referral to see if our Guided Service suits you, and to determine whether you reside in an eligible PHN.

We are here for you,

tyme

In response to: Re: I’m back, it’s been a while, it’s a struggle

NatureLoverSenior Contributor

Re: I’m back, it’s been a while, it’s a struggle

Hi @Razzle , I'm so sorry you're going through this 😞

I'm wondering if you can reinstate that professional help? Maybe the SANE Guided Service that @tyme mentioned? Or even the SANE Helpline for a spot of counselling?

Sending you good wishes...

In response to: Re: I’m back, it’s been a while, it’s a struggle

RazzleSenior Contributor

Re: I’m back, it’s been a while, it’s a struggle

@Shaz51, great to hear from you, I have been thinking about a lot of you these last few years too. It’s so comforting to know you’re sitting with me, thankyou

In response to: Re: I’m back, it’s been a while, it’s a struggle

RazzleSenior Contributor

Re: I’m back, it’s been a while, it’s a struggle

@tyme, money makes people do terrible things, I just didn’t realise how bad my brother would put money before family. Support is a little thin on the ground at the moment. I will check out the site you have recommended

In response to: Re: I’m back, it’s been a while, it’s a struggle

RazzleSenior Contributor

Re: I’m back, it’s been a while, it’s a struggle

@NatureLover, my heads a bit scattered at the moment, seeking out my old councillor feels pretty overwhelming at the moment. I will check out the link Tyme suggested

In response to: Re: I’m back, it’s been a while, it’s a struggle

tymeModerator

Re: I’m back, it’s been a while, it’s a struggle

We want you to know you are not alone @Razzle . Hold on. I'm a firm believer in what goes around, comes around.

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