Narcisstic Father Driving me Insane!

Narcisstic Personality Disorder and autistic are both factors driving his behaviour.

His autistic side - fails to see understand the other person. Acts like a kid. Does not know how to parent

His NPD side - never receptive to others views and thinks he's is better. Does not like to think that he is wrong. Always right.

Solution - I should move house, always been thinking about social housing. HOWEVER, I don't know how to look after myself yet and am on medication trials to keep me stable.

Every siblings have had an argument of him hoarding junk home and they've piled over the decades. We try to explain to him many reasons why he should just stop but he just wouldn't stop, thinking his NPD mind that his logic is way better. I did some research on NPD and they fear reputation being harmed. So I told my dad that if you keep getting junk home I am going to post them on our family chat, next strike will be our extended family chat, next strike your church group. He got SUPER ANGRY and started cussing at me, tells me to get the f**k out of the house now!

Suddenly I started getting flashbacks of my childhood and adolescent years being beaten up, got screamed unecessarily like just getting an answer wrong for my homework and crying while he was teaching me. My whole body shaking uncontrollably, I ran into my room and locked the door. All those past times being told by my father that I'm not good enough, I'm stupid, dumb amounted to who I am today. I'm starting to get better now with the right medications. Surrounded myself with positive people who helped me realise my strengths and made me feel a lot happier about myself. I have circle of supportive people that's given my the motivation to be strong.

I really hate my dad. He's always arguing and it frustrates you when he doesn't want to listen to you but keep voicing his opinions. I try to empathise, like probably his way of buying junk home and is an affordable way to people who goes to shopping centres, it's his form of coping mechanism to stress. He's gotta build healthier habits but it's a struggle because of his limited interests symptoms due to being autistic. We have tried exploring different interests. All in all I've just given up and try to focus on myself the most because I need to catch up with life from the medication trials now almost coming to the right ones and so much adult skills to build up. Doing my best to ignore him.

When I am fully stable and built up enough money, I'm going to move outside.

What you see of my dad at church, a well respected man, praised.

But what you see at home behind closed doors the screaming fighting rubbish collected, high ego father, children emotionally damaged.

Just FYI, "if you have seen one type of autistic, that is just one type of autistic" There are different portrayals of autism.