Doing Better...

Hi @Former-Member ,

Thank you for your post. I'm glad to hear things are better today. You have been very courageous, and I hear and know first-hand that sometimes, things just feel too much.

Due to the nature of the post yesterday, it was flagged and removed by our system to ensure the forums remain a safe space for others to post.

If you have any questions about it, please feel free to email us at team@saneforums.org

It is great to read your posts around the forums tonight.

Kindest, tyme

All good @Former-Member . I guess you have reminded us that we are human, and humans do have ups and downs. As much as we try to put on a brave front, our MH stressors sometimes get the better of us.

For some, they like to get on the forums when things are tough so that they get some peer support and are then able to get out of the darkness.

However, for others, when things are tough, they find it more helpful to step aside from the forums to give themselves some offline time.

It's about doing what is most helpful for you @Former-Member . We are happy to support you.

I am happy to hear things are better tonight.

Good Evening @Former-Member ,

How are you? Hope things have been better 🙂

I'm sitting with you tonight @Former-Member . I hear it is tough tonight.

Please know you are not alone. I'm here with you.

Hugs @Former-Member ,

You have an incredible understanding of love and hope - that's what will get you through.

Many times, for those who are not well, it is not them speaking, but their illness.

I hear you loud and clear. What you are feeling aligns very much with the cycle of grief. Any loss, any grief can trigger the responses you are currently feeling.

Kindness to yourself, support for yourself is something that will support you to rise above this.

I'm here, listening, taking it all in, and I have great hope that you will come out of this victorious.

For now, just take moment by moment. As you've said, you have many questions - yet will thinking more about these questions answer them tonight?

I'm sitting with you to help you get through tonight. You don't need to feel alone in this.

@tyme

😢 thank you. That's sweet. A comfort.

You're right re-asking won't answer them. That's why I think my mind is telling me it's over. So when it's proven the case it might not hurt so much.

You see I am in this equation too and my insecurities and illness have a say too.

Mine tell me he can't love me anymore because he never did. No one has. So no one will. Isn't that logic?

I don't know, I understand I have to accept in order to heal but how can I accept something I know is my biggest trigger?

Everyone just acts like he was a fling. A crush.

Not that he is everything to me.

I've never been here before how do you let go your only reason to hold on?

How can I walk closer to the edge of my own illness and manage to not fall over the cliff? Rumour also has it that the medication i just started yesterday can make me feel worse at first isn't that a HUGE risk for someone like me? I'm as close as I can get how much further do I have to endure?

After all what is life without love? I've done my time 33yrs of utterly no one romantic or otherwise how do I go back to being nothing after finding out just how fantastic it feels to matter?

How do I stop the questions going round?

Hi @Former-Member ,

Radical acceptance is to accept things we have no control over.

I have been hurt in the past - very much. When I think if those times, I still feel it, even though it has been over 15 years.

That pain may never go away, but I don't live by that pain. I don't live in the past knowing I cannot change the past. Neither do I live in the future because I do not know what the future will hold.

I have a pretty matter-of-fact way of managing. If an upset comes my way, I do a lot of self-talk and say, 'That was meant to be for my own growth and perfecting. It is to make me a better/stronger person.'

When I lose something or feel some sort of loss, I also say, "It was meant to be. Maybe that 'thing' was just not for me, and if I tried holding onto it, I may be hurt a lot more."

Self-talk is not about telling yourself you HAVE to be okay and not feel hurt. It is more about helping you to re-frame the situation so that the hurt doesn't keep you from moving on.

As for the 'rumour' of medication.... having been in many different anti-depressants in my life, it IS a rumour. Or more precisely put, it's a SUPPLEMENT to healing and not the magic pill that zaps up all the hurt. I'd rather you know this so you can be prepared for it. Anti-depressants are to support you alongside your recovery.

If any of this does not make sense to you or you do not agree, please feel free to take it with a grain of salt.

No pressure, obligation, or offence.

hugs, tyme