Night mares

I too was institutionally abused between 8 and 12 years of age.My vivid disturbing dreams tend to occur when I have not had sufficient daily interaction and activity.It is my mind saying alright ,if your not going to have enough of a life,here's some night medicine for you.

Hi @Freedom11,

I just read your post and I really feel for you. Those types of dreams which are very realistic and frightening are never fun. I have had a few of them over the years and they are hard to shake off. Whenever my kids have a nightmare I remind them it was a dream , it's not real and they are safe.

It must be particularly difficult when it breaks your sleep as (I agree with you) it doesn't help with a depressive mood.

Have you checked with your GP about the medication being a good fit for you? Maybe a different type of medication would be better?

Have you tried getting physically and mentally exhausted so you just go to bed because you are that tired? I read somewhere that in order to get a better sleep (you may already know this advice) have a hot shower or bath, no stimulates a few hours before bed (e.g. coffee, tea, anything with sugar etc), a cool room with some fresh air flowing through, no TV, mobile phones etc when in bed.

I really hope these nightmares stop for you and you get a lot better sleep from now on.

Best wishes,

FloatingFeather

@FloatingFeather . Morning thankyou for your advice. I have tried all the different ways to help that you have mentioned. I'm on a waiting list to see my physiological again to make sure my meds are correct as I don't feel they are working for me atm.

Hi @Freedom11 know your pain. I get nightmares a lot, although medication has helped a fair bit- I’m sorry meds haven’t helped you.

don’t really have any suggestions for advice, just that I know your pain

I had a bit of a cautious look for any dream analysis sources. I found something in Very Well Mind, which usually gives good info. The article bundles being attacked and being chased in the same category. The interesting thing is they seem to identify animal attacks with suppressed instinctual emotions such as anger and passion.

Additionally, mysterious assailants may indicate confronting trauma and opposite-sex assailants may indicate intimate relational anxieties (though that might apply more to hetero-sexual or hetero-normative people (who knows, though? That feels like a whole other question)).

It's a pretty general take about a very intuitive field but could be a starting point.

https://www.verywellmind.com/understanding-your-dreams-2795935

Hi @Freedom11

I just wanted to reach out and offer you some support 💜

I’m so sorry to hear that you’re experiencing constant nightmares and my heart goes out to you 💜

As I listened to this part of your story, I could hear so many powerful emotions and how desperately you’re trying to find some relief from the nightmares that continue to torment you 💜

In my experience, living with nightmares can be incredibly overwhelming and distressing (not only because of the content) but also because of the far reaching impact they have on so many other areas of our lives.

Like you, I also desperately wanted to understand the underlying cause of the nightmares that I continue to experience and although I still have a long way to go, I’m starting to explore the content of some of my nightmares with my Therapist - which I’m finding really helpful.

Although I can’t prevent the nightmares from occurring, I’ve realised that I can learn how to take care of myself following a nightmare, which is something that I’m practicing, as this helps me to minimise the impact that they have on me.

With that being said (and after quite a bit of trial and error) I found a few strategies that have really helped me 😊 As such, I just wanted to take a moment to share these with you, in the hope that something that I share, may be helpful for you too 💜

One of my strategies involves a cuddly little turtle who sits on my bed with me 💜 He has soft blue flippers and a cute little face and when I press one of the buttons on his shell, he projects soft blue waves onto the ceiling and the walls of my bedroom 😊 If I press another button, I can hear the sound of the ocean and the waves gently breaking on the shore. I find the rhythmic patterns of the waves really comforting and eventually, I’m able to soothe myself to the point where I can fall back to sleep.

Before my little turtle came along, I use to listen to music that I found calming and wrap myself up in a soft fluffy blanket. Other times I repeated some very simple affirmations that helped me to remind myself that I was safe and that I was ok 💜

Similar to what you described, there are also times when I suddenly wake up in a state of panic and I feel scared, disconnected and disoriented and I struggle to determine if I’ve just had a nightmare, or if the event has really happened.

These moments are particularly scary and so during these times, I use a grounding technique to help me to come back into the here and now and orientate myself to my surroundings. As such, I take a moment to name five things that I can see around me, four things that I can feel around me, three things that I can hear around me, two things that I can smell and one thing that I can taste.

Sometimes, it’s tricky to think of something for the last two and so I often just focus on the first three - which still really helps me 😊

Although these strategies don’t stop the nightmares (I really wish that they did 💜) they play an important part in reducing some of the impact, which is helpful in the sense that I feel a little bit more in control, as I can effectively regulate my emotions and fall back to sleep just that little bit faster.

As I continued to listen to your story, I ever so gently wondered if an organisation called Blue Knot may be helpful for you 💜

Basically, Blue Knot provides support for adults who have experienced childhood trauma and abuse.

One of the ways that they provide support is through the Blue Knot Helpline 💜 This particular Helpline is staffed by specialist trauma counsellors who provide short term counselling support, information and referrals for people who are looking for ongoing support.

In addition to the above, they also provide a wealth of resources and information in relation to topics such as understanding trauma and abuse, self-care and coping strategies.

I’ve contacted the Helpline on several occasions and I’ve always had a really positive experiences, where I felt listened to, validated and supported 😊

If this is something that you feel may be helpful for you, you can contact the Helpline on: 1300 657 380.

They operate Monday to Sunday (including public holidays) from 9.00am until 5.00pm AEST.

You can also email them at: helpline@blueknot.org.au

I’ve just provided the link to their website below in case you would like to explore this further:

https://blueknot.org.au/

I hope that this helps you a little bit and please remember that you’re always welcome to reach out here whenever you need to 💜

Take kind and gentle care of yourself,

ShiningStar 💜

@ShiningStar Hi. Thankyou for your amazing words of advice. I have tried using some of these ways already but some I haven't so thankyou.

I do like the though of having something I can hug up to for comfort when I have the nightmares.

I have also found that now my meds have been sablised a bit I still get the night mares just not as often.

I'm always looking for new ways to help with my mental health as I find sometimes things work to almost me down and other times they don't so know other ways that people use is always a brilliant tool to have

Hi @Freedom11

It’s so lovely to hear from you 💜

That’s wonderful that some of the strategies were helpful and I love how hugging something for comfort resonated with you 💜 Out of all of the different strategies, this one if probably my favourite 😊

I’m so pleased that your medication has been stabilized and that you’ve been able to experience some relief from the nightmares 💜

I love how you’re always looking for resources that you can use to support your mental health 😊 Sometimes it can be a little bit of trial and error in terms of finding the tools that work for us and it’s definitely frustrating and disheartening when something that has worked so well becomes less effective.

Absolutely! People with lived experience have such an incredible wealth of knowledge and sharing our experiences is definitely one of the ways that we can begin to build a rich and diverse tool box of amazing resources 💜

It’s been wonderful to be able to connect with you and I look forward to seeing you around the forums 💜

Take kind and gentle care of yourself,

ShiningStar 💜