Involuntary Hospitalisation - how to help family member

Hi @MDAFG and welcome to the forums. It sounds like a stressful time for you and your family and I hope you will get some support here. It sounds like you want to support your sister but are unsure of what to do next. I'm going to tag @BPDSurvivor as they have great insight and I'll also pop a thread here for you to read in case it's helpful. You can also click on the 'borderline personality disorder' icon at the bottom of the page or search in the search bar for more threads/posts on this topic.

All the best with supporting your sister and a little reminder to take care of yourself while on this journey. I hope you have some supports in place.

Please take care, Paperdaisy

Hi there @MDAFG. Welcome to the forums, I know there are lots of people here who can give you support in what could be a very worrying time ❤️

Your desire to and persistence in supporting her is a real strength. It's very special that you're looking for information and shows that you really care for her. In the forums, we have lots of people who have lived through involuntary hospitalisations and can find them really disempowering and traumatic.

Here is a family, friends and carers factsheet we have. It lists out some supports, tips and also to our carers gateway phone line, where you can get some extra support if you need it.

While I don't have much experience of what you're going through, a close friend was in your position when her husband was hospitalised. They gave her regular calls to update her on his situation and she was involved in a plan for when he was released. Maybe you could call the hospital to see if your sister has listed anyone?

Sending strength,

TuxedoCat

if she’s got bpd how is this related to delusions?

this is two opposite disorders bpd is child hood trauma but I know people with bpd with severe adult trauma. So basically your calling a traumatized person delusional. Maybe she cut family off because they are working with the hospital making her mental health break down? Maybe the people who have called crisis teams having her hospitalized are the delusional ones? Maybe she’s really genuinely got people after her and cut out people to divide so if she’s in danger no one else is in danger with her ? THE POINT IS YOU JUST DONT KNOW WHAT IS GOING ON UNTIL YOU PUT ASIDE A FULL DAY FOR A START TO JUST FOCUS ON LISTENING TO WHAT SHE HAS TO SAY FIRST! It’s ridiculous people get labeled delusional after a hour with a psych ! Where’s the concrete evidence that her claim of people conspiring against her or after her is a delusion in first place? Mental hospitals can lead to death and that’s even with every staff member intending to do the right thing. For a start I bet the mental hospital is filled with nurses taking her blood pressure and sedating her on medication rather then placing a few hours aside each day to get to the CORE of who she is and what’s troubling her. Flashbacks often look like delusions too! Flashbacks of unconscious trauma look like outright psychosis!!!!!! And the truth is that as much as people want to care for others i highly doubt multiple people have really contacted mental health services to help her delusions. People don’t have the time for that .. sounds more like she’s being gaslighted and pushed further into a hole! I DONT KNOW AND YOU DONT KNOW. The answers lay in HER!!!! On a forensic level what factual evidence is there that she’s experiencing delusions. I don’t care if friends family police or the pope said so . What concrete evidence is there to back up this. IT SHOULD BE ILLEGAL TO LABEL SOME ONE DELUSIONAL ESPECIALLY PARANOID DELUSIONAL WITHOUT A THOUROUGH INVESTIGATION INTO EVERYTHING THE PERSON SAYS.

Hi @MDAFG,

Welcome to the forums - it's nice to have you here. I am FloatingFeather and I am one of the peer support workers. I just want to let you know I feel for you, your family and your sister. Involuntary hospitalisation can be a really difficult thing to happen to anyone - and it is also hard to watch someone you love being forced to go to hospital against their will. A family member of mine was involuntarily hospitalised due to a serious mental health illness many years ago - it was something that he was very angry about at the time but in time and upon reflection he realised that is what he needed.

It is hard to support someone you love if they refuse to communicate. Maybe just keep reaching out every couple of days and remind her that you are there for her whenever she needs you? Do you know if there is a social worker that works at the hospital? Maybe they could be a point of contact to working with the hospital?

I wish you all the best during this very difficult time. Please take care of yourself as well as this is not easy for anyone involved.

Please reach to this community too - it is a very supportive and safe space if you need to chat.

Best wishes,

FloatingFeather

There is no medication to cure BPD. People are allowed to cry it's a normal human emotion you are allowed to have.being sensitive is not a crime

Thanks for sharing @Marilyn52 ,

I absolutely agree with what you have said.

BPD is highly stigmatised.

@MDAFG , I hope your sister's medical team will be able to support your sister long term. It sounds like there's more than just BPD going on for her.

At this time, @MDAFG , it's also important that you find supports for yourself so that you don't buckle under the weight of what is happening.

Caring for the carer is of utmost importance.

Thank you for caring for your sister. Without people like you, many with mental health conditions would be worse off.

Hugs,

tyme

I also have a sister that suffers from delusional relligious psychosis and has all the systems according to the literature, but she refuses to take any advice and doesn't believe that there is any thing wrong with here, She believes she is a prophet of God and that she can heal people from their sickness. She has this habit of making or convincing this person that they are sick and then taking him or her to the hospital after she has done all her praying and anointing of oils and when the Doctors can;t find anything wrong with them, she has performed another mirical. AND she doesn't know she's doing it. I try to explain that this is what she is doing, but she won't have a bar of it. For the last 3years she has been caring for our elderly mother and with the help of NCAT, I have finally got Mum away from my sister's place and into a nursing home with full time professional care, but this hasn't stopped her.. She gave Mum a mobile phone and now she calls Mum every day, sometimes half a dozen times a day and keeps Mum locked in her delusion of God and her unrealistic world. She has done damage to our Mother as Mum can no longer resist her, I suspect Mum may have some sort of stockholm syndrome because Mum feels sorry for her and so it goes on. The worst part about this story is that I cannot stop my sister from psychogically and emotionally hurting our Mother.because 13 years ago, Mum appointed her as her Guardian and i can't stop her. what do I do?

Hi @Menevilence ,

It sounds like your sister is very unwell. I don’t know enough to understand what it means in terms of guardianship. Am I right in assuming your mum is aged?

I hope your sister will find the support she so desperately needs. Being unaware of her delusions probably tells you she is very unwell as she cannot differentiate reality from delusions.

Sorry, I don’t have much to share,

BPDSurvivor