Very Worried Mama

I’m so sorry to hear what you’re going through with your daughter @Krishna; and that tonight is especially tough. It’s so hard to see someone you love struggle and not be able to support them the way you’d like. It sounds like it has been a long journey with your daughter and it’s clear from your post how much you love her and have been through everything alongside her. It sounds like your daughter is where she needs to be right now.

From what you’ve written, I get the sense that you’ve been the calm, strong support that is always there for your daughter. That is a huge task and it’s understandable that you’re feeling emotionally spent tonight.

Is there something you can do to look after you tonight? ❤️

Thanks @Former-Member for your reply. Just feeling overwhelmed with sadness tonight. It’s been such a long road these past 10 years and my heart just aches for my girl. I’ll have an early night and try and get some rest. Thanks again 🙏❤️

Hey @Krishna

It's great that you are reaching out here but can I just ask if you have some professional support?

As our children grow up, they can experience such intense emotions and it can be so confusing when they don't understand why that is or feel that it is unfair that they feel this way. Make sure you look after yourself so that as she gets help and becomes more aware of the feelings, you are there to support her journey to develop the communication skills to describe what she is going through. I wish you both the best on this hard journey.

Thanks @AussieRecharger My daughter is 27 and suffers from drug induced schizophrenia and has estranged herself from her family for the past 2 1/2 years. I have had professional support in the past but not presently. This news received today has just really thrown me as I’d been told that she has been quite stable of late, complying with meds and ECTs. It just breaks my heart that she has resorted to this.

Oh @Krishna, my heart is with you reading your post 💛

How are you feeling today? Did you manage to get some rest and the space you needed to process the news?

@AussieRecharger was wise in asking whether you currently have any professional support, and whilst I understand that as a carer our own mental health needs wax and wane with those of our loved one, I wanted to leave the number for the SANE counselling service here with you, just in case you feel it might help to share in an anonymous and supported way: 1800 187263

Here today in the forums for a chat if that might help 😊 Always happy to listen 🌼

Thank you @Former-Member for your reply. Just feeling so emotionally drained. I suppose thats to be expected. Trying to focus on other things today but finding that difficult. Keep ruminating which makes things worse I know. Still a little teary trying to come to terms with things. Have spoken to the hospital this morning but not much news other than my girl is safe am being well cared for which I have to remind myself of. Bitterly cold and windy here so will perhaps just be kind to myself this afternoon and rest. Thank you 🙏

I think you're right in saying it's to be expected @Krishna, but it doesn't make it any easier per say...that emotional drain can feel quite heavy and naturally makes it hard to concentrate. With that being said, please go gently with yourself today.

Someone kind and generous shared this piece of advice with me, and I feel it might land in the right place by sharing here with you:

When we're feeling burnt out, which is a natural response to emotionally impactful events and those that require an emotional response or labour, this is when we need to be honouring ourselves. The practice of taking the time each day to do one thing that honours yourself, and to state out loud e.g. "by eating these grapes, I'm honouring myself", creates a space for self-love and also ripples outwards to others to honour you in kind.

Today is super cold. I've put my Oodie in the dryer to warm it up so that this evening when I finish work I'll put it on and say out loud "by providing myself with warmth and comfort, I am honouring myself". I know it sounds a bit airy, but it can't hurt. I wonder if you'd care to join me in such a practice, @Krishna?

Thanks @Former-Member Sounds like a plan. Will honour myself right now by making a soothing cup of tea, light the fire to warm my bones and do some crotcheting and just be. Great advice thanks 🙏

That sounds heavenly @Krishna, I hope you find some solace in that space.

Thank you for your support today @Former-Member . I had a better afternoon making time to honour myself. It did make a difference. Hope your oodie keeps you cosy tonight. 6 degrees here at present and very grateful to have a woodfire. Have spoken to my daughters team at the hospital and have been told her actions were due to medication problems so they will keep her for a little while and get that sorted and hopefully find her more supportive accommodation. I can rest easier tonight knowing she is being well cared for. 🙏❤️