pepsSenior Contributor
Possible hospital admission
This is my first post so not sure if I'm doing the right thing.
I've been struggling these past few weeks with my mental health getting worse. I have CPTSD, dissociative amnesia and depression and they are all causing problems. I've been getting new memories of my trauma and having flash backs. In-between the high anxiety I feel really low and depressed. In order to cope with it all I dissociate or i'm getting SH and suicide thoughts. Even though I don't want to act on them the thoughts are still distressing. I've also lost my appetite so am skipping meals and my insulin (diabetic) and losing weight. But i'm happy about the weight lose and get more depressed if i'm not losing weight. I didn't cope well when I saw my psychologist last week and she suggested I need to think about going to hospital. The problem i'm having is I've just started a new job and its going well. For some reason work is the only place I've been able to function reasonable well. I'm worried if I take time off to go to hospital I'm going to lose my job. I also feel guilty because if I take time off i'm leaving them short staffed and people will have to do extra to cover me while I'm gone. I'm not sure how helpfully hospital is going to be and feel like I won't be processing the trauma there like I would with my psychologist. So I'm worried when I leave hospital and start processing the trauma again I'm going to be back where I started before hospital. How can I make the right decision? i'm just really lost at what to do.