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SharmaNew Contributor
Hello I am pretty down today because of impact of my husbands TBI on his behaviour towards me. The negative and soul destroying impact his perception of the world and me have on me is greater and more powerful than all the self care I can give myself. I feel depleted, tired and insignificant. I try to not feel sorry for myself because I have no other way to see how I feel about myself when it gets like this.
In response to: Newbie
Unknown userMember
Hey there @Sharma,
Big welcome to the forums 😊This is a safe place to express your needs, experiences and feelings that arise with being a carer, and I'm so glad to see you've found your way to this supportive community.
It sounds like you're balancing quite a lot there between your husbands needs with his TBI, but also your own. I'm wondering whether you've been able to put supports in place for yourself i.e. chatting with a trusted GP, a counsellor, or even a friend who can provide a shoulder when you need one?
The feelings you've mentioned here today are so common to those who are carers, though they can be heavy and sometimes hard to walk with, but please know that you deserve to be heard, you deserve to feel supported, and you deserve to be kind to yourself (not just to the person you care for) 💙
In the SANE community we are truly fortunate to have some incredible community guides in our camp. These are the members who have lived experience and are brilliant at making connections and providing support to our members. I'd love to tag a few here and I'm sure they'll make you feel right at home @Shaz51 @outlander @ShiningStar @Faith-and-Hope @Zoe7 @Judi9877 @wellwellwellnez @Anastasia @HenryX @Snowie @jem80 @NatureLover
Go gently with yourself today @Sharma, and if you need any support here in the forums, please don't hesitate to reach out by tagging a moderator, just like this @Former-Member
Rhye ☘️
In response to: Newbie
Zoe7Senior Contributor
Hey @Sharma That is a hard place to be sitting and so much to deal with. It is so hard when the expectations we have of ourselves and our personal situation do not align with our feelings ...and to be treated badly by those we love and care for in amongst all that makes it even harder. I believe you have every right to be feeling sorry for yourself - that is not, in my opinion, a flaw of character, it is a natural human response to the incredibly difficult position you are in. We all need times to be able to feel and let our emotions out so let those waves wash over you, acknowledge you are doing it hard and that life is incredibly tough right now. Do you have support for your husband - and also for yourself? You do not have to do this all alone.
In response to: Newbie
Owen45Senior Contributor
Sounds a terrible situation.
In response to: Re: Newbie
Faith-and-HopeSenior Contributor
Hi and welcome @Sharma 👋
Here and listening ….
In response to: Re: Newbie
Shaz51Senior Contributor
@Sharmathinking of you lots today , how are you going
In response to: Newbie
SJT63Senior Contributor
Hi @Sharma yes that resonates with me.
Mine's mental illness isn't injury related, but when he's having an episode his treatment of me is soul destroying and it's very hard to keep bouncing back as if nothing was ever said or done.
I have no answers or tips, just empathy and support x
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Help us push aside the stigma and discrimination surrounding complex mental health and change the way people talk about, and care for, mental illness.
SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.
SANE values diversity. We are committed to providing a safe, culturally appropriate, and inclusive service for all people, regardless of their ethnicity, faith, disability, sexuality, or gender identity.
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