Struggling

Hi @Greatwhiteshark

Reaching out for help is really hard & coming here and reaching out to the community shows A LOT of courage. No one should have to go through what you have been through, or feel the sadness that you feel - but you are not alone.

Something that stands out to me in your post is that you can articulate that something’s not right. Being so self aware of your emotions is something that not everyone can do, and that awareness is a great strength that will really help you get well.

I’m not quite sure of your background or about the people you are reaching out to, but what I can confidently say is that you don’t have to fear reaching out for help from a professional. Have you spoken to a professional before? A GP, counsellor, psychologist etc can really help you gain clarity on what’s going on for you AND give you strategies on how to manage that.

Would you consider seeking professional help?

Sometimes loved ones don’t know how to react, for a whole bunch of reasons – eg: ‘ I don’t know what to say” “I don’t know how to help” “What if I make it worse?” Seeing a professional first can help you articulate what you need from them in terms of support and what the journey ahead looks like.

In the meantime we are here to support you on your help seeking journey. The members here have a range of experiences, but the one thing they all have in common is that they are an amazing bunch of supportive people.

This factsheet "Thinking of suicide" from SANE could also be a useful resource.

This factsheet from SuicideLine about how to tell someone you're feeling suicidal may also be useful

While trying to find a professional – it’s really important that you call and speak to a counsellor. Some great free services include;

Lifeline (13 11 14)

Suicide Call Back Service (1300 659 467)

You've bravely taken the step towards getting help, keep going - pick up the phone and take the next step.

Please remember, most suicidal thoughts are associated with underlying causes such as mental illness (for example, depression), a trauma or other issues. These can be helped by psychological treatments, medication and support, or a combination of these. Remember people do get through this – even people who feel as badly as you feel now. So get help now – you can survive.

I hope to see you back in here soon

NikNik

@Greatwhiteshark

I hear the desire to open up, and the need to be heard and validated. But I also hear hurt, fear and caution.

I agree with @NikNik about a counsellor or psychologist helping with some of the language, and strategies on how to approach the situation. This idea also provides the additional emotional support it may take for you to tackle the situation, and how to cope with responses and reactions.

Practically, perhaps a text or message indicating that you need to make a time to catch up, as you haven't been travelling too well lately, could help to set the scene. It gives them some preempting, and provides a specific time for you to talk away from other distractions. Leaving some of the printed material suggested by NikNik on the coffee table may also plant the seed.

You may start the conversation by saying something like, 'I don't want you to respond now, or feel you need to say anything, I just want you to listen.' This gives them permission to listen, and to not have to think of a response, which they might feel compelled to do. From there you might say something like, I'm currently seeing a psychologist and I'd really like your support with this.

I see this proposal as a way of you being able to express your feelings, and of being heard, while also giving permission for them not to have the answers, and inviting them to be involved in the process. This opens dialogue, and hopefully provides further opportunity to talk, maybe even with the psychologist.

I'm sure you'll put your own spin on it, and make it your own.

Best wishes with the next step.

We're here, and would love to hear how you get on.

Karma

I learnt from downloading an app called "panic attacks" that the first step is saying SO BE IT. If you do open up to someone and they walk away, then that is the worst thing that could happen. We have to let go what we don't have control over. Download it, give it a listen, and hopefully it can help you like it helped me xo

Greatwhiteshark, I am sure that in this forum if there is not one or more helpful hints I will go .........

We are all in a leaky boat and have joined up because of the anomimity and the advise, in my case has been super. Open your heart and soul, at your own pace and you should be flooded with small snippits of information which you can filter out the helpful ones and store the others just in case they may help someone else. Cogratulation for taking the first step towards resumming normality.

Regards, loopy

I agree with what loopy has said,

this anonymity of the forum is fantastic, I am a very private person by nature I have massive trust issues with alot of people I know family included.

With the way this forum is opening up and writing what you are going through to people who may or may not be going through the same stuff is very helpful. There is no judging and you can ramble away if needed

We understand the need to express what we are going thru I have been more open here then anywhere else

For me just knowing I am being heard by people I do not know and can't judge me for my illness has been very helpful

If it is ok I was wondering what you are going thru symptom wise?

I also agree with niknik getting professional help is Definately going to help take your time and don't feel bad if you don't get along with the first psychologist/psychiatrist there are lots out there but you need to find one that you "click with" and feel comfortable with

hope this helps a little bit

regards

kato

very poetic @Loopy, you have some real pearls to share.

@Kato, while practcing in a safe environment, builds skills and confidence to apply outside of the forums. You are certainly on your way!

@Greatwhiteshark just wondering how things are for you since you last posted?

Visit (post) again soon, 'ya all come back now ya hear'.