Dear younger me

@Bow 💕🙏🌹💐

Here's mine that I wrote a few days ago on another thread

xox

Dear younger me

Hi @Bow .

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@Bow wrote:

I was doing some painting today and listening to some music and a song called Dead Younger Me was playing. It made me think if i could write a letter to my younger self what would it say? Do you every think about that? What you would tell your younger self?

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Damn, this is something that keeps coming back to haunt me over and over again during the years. Perhaps especially because many people in my life have always loved to harp on that my terrible life is all my own fault - without ever actually clarifying what I could've done in the past to have gotten a better lot. I've spent most of the past 2 decades trying to figure that out, and I still don't know what the hell their talking about. It's like the game was rigged; no matter which play I made, I was always guaranteed to lose. If the ever was a decent road - or even a better road, I've never been able to figure out what it was.

The only "worldly wisdom" that hindsight has given me which I could pass on to my younger self is to not trust certain nasty, exploitive people I got roped in with in my youth and to especially never turn to the mental health system. That advice could've spared me a fair bit in senseless sufferring; but it still wouldn't have given me any guidance on how to get a worthwhile life with love and true family.

If we're being perfectly honest, in my youth I was a lot bolder and more generous towards myself and my own best interests when it came to a certain deed that we can't discuss very openly on these forums (s-----e). I had the gumption for it much more back then then I do today, and plenty of cause. But with foolish youthful optimism, I opted instead to roll the dice with life. All those emphatic empty promises of boundless hope floating through the media that are just so seductive to the unbroken youthful spirit.

If I really could send a message back to my younger self, I'd urge him to make a differant choice. With all my hindsight, that's about as close to a retrospective winning play as I've ever been able to recognize.

Dear Younger Me,

I don't really know where to begin or what to tell you to make things easier for you. I guess I just want to reassure you that although your young life was very difficult that you are going to find a Husband that worships the ground you walk on and that two of your three children are loving and kind most times. Be careful what you wish for. That little girl that you so desperately wanted will hurt you so you need to be careful of that relationship.

I think you already know that school is your safe place. Find teachers to confide in, maybe if you trust them enough one of them will help you to find a way out of your torment. I am really sorry for what you went through. You were only an innocent child and you didn't deserve it. You deserved someone that would stand up and protect you from the bad things.

Learn to trust people. I know that you are still scared of being hurt, rejected and abandoned but you need to learn to let others in. Some of those others want to help you. Do not be scared. Accept the help. Don't give up the social side of you just because you have been moved around all your life and can't see the point of making friends. It's not too late to make new connections now. Your life is not over yet. If you learn to expand your horizens and make more friends maybe your future will not be as lonely as my life is now.

I don't know what else to tell you. I wish I could give you the lotto numbers lol to make life a little easier.

Life is a struggle. I don't know if it's worth the struggle yet. The jury is still out on that one...

Meggle

Dear Younger Me,

Hang in there kid, you are going to find strength and wonders you never knew existed. Life is going to kick you in the teeth, but you are going to kick back and find your way out of the dark.

Be unapologetically YOU. Don't listen to the haters and bullies of this world, they have no idea how incredible you truly are.

Your family may not appreciate you or love you, but you can find a new family. Latch on to the positive people in your life that make you feel heard, appreciated and loved. They are your true family.
As soon as you can support yourself, get the f*ck out of that house and don't look back. Chase your own dreams with reckless abandon, feel the fear and do it anyway. There is so much to see and do in life that brings joy to the soul, do not settle for "some day", get after it now! Learn as much as you can, see as much of the world as you can, take photos of beautiful places, write amazing poetry, play guitar, sing, dance, run in the rain.
Be your own unconditional best friend. Always be kind to others, always. Don't wait for someone to save you, they are not coming. You've gotta save yourself and it will be hard at first, but you will save yourself. You have so much more courage and strength than you could possibly imagine.

Always listen to that quiet little voice in your head, the hairs that stand up on the back of your neck and that gut feeling you get. Sometimes your heart will fool you, but that little voice, those little hairs and your gut instinct will never send you astray.
Remember this saying, "Yesterday is history, tomorrow a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why they call it the present." Grab hold of that present and live your best life!

One last thing, I love you. xx

BB 🐰💙

@Bow thank you, this was an empowering exercise xx

Hi @Oaktree @MDT @Anastasia @chibam xx