Finding a new job with depression & anxiety Part 1

Hi there,

I have a serious issue to put out there. I'm honestly exhausted just thinking about it so bear with me if I ramble on...

I mentioned in my last post that I was having struggles with my previous job with a manager that would bully me, she was too intimidating to confront and having depression and anxiety I struggled to confront her about certain situations. I had watched 4 other staff members try to deal with the same issues I was having and they either got fired or pushed out of the job. It was sad to see myself hating a job I once loved and enjoyed because of one person but I knew nothing would change if I stayed and put up with that kind of bad treatment. Fast forward to now - I decided to finally quit! I found another job to keep me afloat financially. Everything seemed great at first I got told with this new job that I would receive training and get shown everything. The new job was a business owned by husband and wife, but I would need to deal directly with the husband who was a Dr. When the wife hired me she kept telling me they need someone "long term" and not someone that was just going to leave shortly. I found that kind of strange because she mentioned it multiple times. So I asked one of the managers what was the reason they hired so many people for my position and she explained there was a high staff turnover. Alarm bells rang in my head but I gave myself the encouragement that I could handle anything compared to what I dealt with the last job I had. My first day walking in no one showed me anything - they had a girl who started just before i did try to train me. The main Dr (boss) was so innappropriate to me he made me feel so uncomfortable I didn't even last 2 days. Just so you don't think that I gave up for nothing I'll explain a little further... When I say he was innappropriate for example he would speak to me in a really sarcastic way like I was an idiot. He swore at me and got angry (multiple times) on the first day when I was unsure about something. He was intimidating to me everytime he asked me something. When I would answer the phone if it was him he would order me to do stuff he knew I hadn't been shown yet and when I would try to respond to him he would just hang up and expect it to get done. This continued onto the second day. It made the work environment so horrible I remember going for my lunch break and not wanting to go back. After my second day I went home and cried - not because of him but because I felt like I had walked into something so damaging to my MH. The next morning I called his wife and explained I was not returning. She tried to make it out like I wasn't mature enough to stick it out under pressure and be professional about it. I told her I did not find it professional or appropriate that her husband spoke to me the way he did, after explaining to her how he spoke to me and what had happened she didn't really have a response.

Thank you for reading this far I know it's a long post - my point is now I am unemployed and feel completely defeated. I am struggling with my MH so much so that everytime I think about getting another job or look for another job I freak out and visualize getting treated badly again.

Does anyone know if there are any jobs out there that people with depression and anxiety can do? I'm so lost and I feel as though I'm not worth anything to anyone. I actually love working when I know what I'm doing but the last 2 jobs have been so traumatic for me that I don't know how I can push myself to get out there again. Has anyone out there been in this position? I need to find another job really soon because I have rent to pay too (lucky my partner is understanding and supportive). I have never been this stressed about my life like this before, it feels horrible