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Daughter with BPD and projecting blame

BC48New Contributor

Daughter with BPD and projecting blame

hi, I have a 38 year old daughter with BPD. She lives in a SIL managed by Mind. A couple of months ago she decided I was to blame for all her problems - going back to sexual assault, eating disorder, self harm to recent migraines. She sent me a very unpleasant email saying she doesn’t want me in her life anymore and that I harm her.

i expected her to come back (she has done this for 2-3 days before) but 2 months later she is still ignoring text messages etc,

i feel devastated as since she moved to her apartment we have had a much better and ‘adult’ relationship .

i have suggested family therapy but this suggestion has been ignored.

any suggestions would be appreciated. I gave her complete space for 4 weeks thinking she might just be ‘sorting herself out’- the thoughts of the Mind workers.

2 replies

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In response to: Daughter with BPD and projecting blame

lingardCasual Contributor

Re: Daughter with BPD and projecting blame

This would be extremely distressing for you. I really feel for you. You say she hasn't resonded to your texts for two months. I actually can't sugget anything other than: stop texting. Your daughter may be getting a perverse sense of pleasure out of knowing that you are frantic to hear from her. By stopping texting, you may give her cause to think about what she is actually doing and why.

Hope this helps.

In response to: Re: Daughter with BPD and projecting blame

Shaz51Senior Contributor

Re: Daughter with BPD and projecting blame

sending you lots of tender hugs my @lingard , @BC48

click on this link to a thread called Carers Hints and tips to Success and 8 dimensions of wellness to have a look at

How are you going @lingard , @BC48 , remeber you are not alone my friends

@Smc, @Anastasia , @Faith-and-Hope

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