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how do you know when its time!

Unknown userMember22 May 2021, 9:49 am AEST

how do you know when its time!

Hi Everyone

some of you know a bit about me

I have been thinking about the quality of life I have

From the crap upbringing living rough since 14 to getting married 2 children then divorce all this while enduring physical pain and many surgeries since 1997.

I'm really not sure I want to be on this planet anymore, doctors say I need 2 more surgeries and more in the future.

How much are we supposed to bare, if I was a pet I would have been put out of my misery and pain.

why is it so frowned upon that you want to leave with a little dignity or on your own terms.

the doctors will not give any guarantees that the next surgeries will ease my pain so I'm thinking I'm not going to have them/I just can't do it anymore and would love to be pain-free just for a while

Is it too much to ask?

Both my girls are happy for me to choose my own time and understand what ive been through and still going through.

I just don't think I want to be here anymore but i just need to decide where and when

3 replies

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In response to: how do you know when its time!

TrufflesSenior Contributor22 May 2021, 9:59 am AEST

Re: how do you know when its time!

Hi @Former-Member we're here for you today if you need some support

In response to: how do you know when its time!

Unknown userMember22 May 2021, 11:12 am AEST

Re: how do you know when its time!

@Former-Member my friend was in the same situation years ago. She was a member of Dying With Dignity Victoria before the euthanasia laws were passed and euthanased herself before the laws changed.

Theres only so much that someones is expected to put up with and bear given age, situation and health condition. I am so glad the euthanasia laws allow someone to die in peace.

I know however it must be a mixture of grief and stark realisation for people once they realise its time for them to leave.

Tearful.

There are compassionate end of life counsellors that can guide you through this important juncture of your life - they are known as doulas if you are not aware.

You may have done research on them. I have a friend online who is a doula and funeral houses are now employing them.

I hope that this stage in your life brings you to a stage of peace and acceptance.

That is not too much to ask for.

When I die I would prefer to have end of life counselling and shamanic rites.

This earth is not what it is and my belief there is life after death. I have come to this conclusion by reading Elizabeth Kubler-Ross who was an end of life/death pioneer. Her books are amazing.

You deserve to have a good death and to easily come to terms with your own passing.

I hope that you have this and more.

And most importantly LOVE

In response to: Re: how do you know when its time!

Unknown userMember22 May 2021, 11:36 am AEST

Re: how do you know when its time!

thank you for your wonderful insight and care

I've never heard of doulas before but I will look them up.

I have not been one to believe in the afterlife . From a young age religion and myself crossed paths and it wasn't a pleasurable experience. I don't have much time or thought for those associated with the cloth and their gods.

i happily respect other people's beliefs and religions it's just not for me and I hope people can accept that and me for who i am.

As i said ive spoken to my daughters and they are happy for me to make my decision as they know what my life is and was the only thing that makes the decision is my grand kids.

i dont know what to say to them .they are young and i dont want them tramatised in any way

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