Ect treatment

Well i havent been on the forums for the the last month or so as i havebeen in hospital having ect treatment.Its been pretty hard going. I didnt want it, but khew i needed it, as i was feeling very suicidal.. so my treating psychiatrist got me in hospital within a couple of days. I found it really stressful as i was in a two bed ward for most of the time. I then spat the dummy big time and said i was going home as i could no longed handle being in a shared ward. They quickly found me a single room, so i stayed for the remainder of my treatment..I did find that this stay i asked more fore what i needed, someting im not very good at doing.

My psychiatrist told me i was a cranky pants when i went in. Guess i was feeling angry with the whole world really. I always feel angry with myself primarily. I feel like complete and utter failure, even though i know it takes strenghth to admit that i need more help from outside.

I still feel irritable and frustrated. It has really affected my memory. I havnt got a clue with my medication, so have taken it all down the the chemistry along with my discharge summay to go into a webster pack from now on. I forgot to ask my gp today for extention on my mental health plan for my psychologist. I am going to have to make sure i right myself notes on what i have to do on a daily basis. I just hope this fog lifts soon. I didnt feel safe driving today. I really dont like how its left me feeling