Am I a difficult client?

I don't think that you are a difficult client @M_P90.

I think that you are choosing inappropriate health settings for the sort of mental illness that you may have and your are not following through with people's advice to choose better tailored health settings for those types of mental illnesses. You could be being avoidant or not telling your doctor the whole picture. Only you know the truth of that.

For example, doctors know that the system is imperfect. But it is the only system that they have.

One of the health settings I have had to use, and only have that privilege because my darling little sib pays for it, is private clinics. I think that insurance companies must tailor the programs in the clinics, but where I was, all the programs and the structure of them, was designed as if every patient had at least one parent that loved them, biological Major Depression and had just been made redundant, but was financially secure.

I am none of those, believe me.

So my doc is able to exempt me from groups because of my DV background, I can't cope with the slightest bit of tension between patients who are unwell or I start to shake, and he exempted me from Clin Psychs because I have done 13 years already, and it is too destabilising to tell my story over and over and over again.

But does that mean that I refuse to go to hospital if I need to? No. Will I go again - a resounding yes.

I pack my suitcase by myself and I even get an Uber there, because I need help.

Its imperfect, but its still good by global standards. Trust me, its great being an Aussie.

All the best and good luck

Corny

Just one last thing before I go and have my 17th cup of tea for the morning @M_P90 .

Another thing that has really helped me with stabilising is perspective and gratitude.

If you struggle with gratitude think about your neighbours. Not the suburban neighbours with the prettier car or the nicer house that you really really want, but your international neighbours.

Do you know what they do to people like me in Indonesia? They would chain me to the floor out the back in an out-house.

Trust me mate, its great to be an Aussie. Think it through, research treatments and take action.

Best Corny

Hi @M_P90 , I'm sorry to hear things are so difficult. I can relate to being hyper-aware of other people's moods and patience levels.

You said you had grown to trust your GP...maybe she was just having a bad day? On the other hand, it's not good to try to talk you out of what you are feeling - it must have felt invalidating. I honestly believe it's OK to be tearful and intense when you are unwell...after all, you're at the doctor for help and to express how you're feeling.

I am hoping that next time you go back to your GP will be better, @M_P90 .

I definitely identify s a difficult client. Also difficult child, student, employee, friend, etc. And, I kind of reach that level of difficulty through what you describe. Exhaustive, emotional labour, that put me (and the person I'm failing to micro-manage) at a distinct disadvantage.

My answer, for now, is deep trust need mutual understanding. That means slowing down and sketching out the complexity of the mental modelling. If people get half way through the long version and start to get exhausted, that's when you say "this is how I feel most of the time" and then they start to get it. People can't see invisible problems, so they need a diagram.

Then the external solutions become clearer for everyone. 'cause you also get to use the diagram. Maybe more importantly, then you get to work with the health system, as opposed to being worked on by the health system.

@M_P90

Not sure, if it is about difficult clients or difficult situations.

In my last session with my Gp she actually apologised for imposing her world view on me, which she had done in a very strong and intense manner. I worked really hard on being the best and easiest to manage client for a long time, now I am learning to be more demanding, and less easily manipulated by all and sundry.

Keep trying to get the best out of your current situation.

@M_P90

I'm sorry to hear your concerns were brushed aside. It seems you may need to find a health professional that is a lot more sensitive and validating. Not all health professionals are like this. I have had many Psychologists, and it takes a while to find one that validates you, or fits with you. There are also many psychological approaches to helping people with their problems. Obviously, your doctor's current approach, and the approach of the other professionals are NOT what you need. I say hunt around for someone who will suit you. Even say straight up before a session "I'm looking for a sensitive validating experience. Validating my emotions is very important to me"