Ended and left feeling confused.

Hi @Ghengis71,

I suffer from anxiety too, and it can get quite severe at times. At the moment I'm feeling Ok.

I don't know if anxiety itself would lead me to end a long-term relationship by text message... I think that is more of a personal decision and was influenced by your ex-partner's personality more than anything else.

Relationships are complex things which take on a life of their own. It's hard to give any kind of advice when you know so little about someone else's relationship and can only see it from the outside looking in.

I wonder did you ever have an inkling that your ex-girlfrined suffered from anxiety, or was the break-up the first time she ever mentioned it? Was she just very good at hiding all her symptoms (and some people are) or did you have concerns about her behavior that led you to believe she might have some psychological issues?

Not ever doing any housework nor paying any bills are not really symptoms of anxiety, as far as I am aware.... although I am no expert! I believe these are more signs of immaturity and having a sense of 'entitlement'. Although, if your ex-girlfrined were chronically depressed, she might have been unmotivated and found it difficult to initiate things. But you said that she went to work, so she was obviously motivated enough to do that. Did she take a lot of sick leave?

I have heard about relationships like yours where the man does absolutely everything and the woman just sits around, enjoying herself. My first thought is always "Like, Wow, that must be extrememly pleasant!!", because I tend to be the one who does pretty much everything around the house, all the time.

But ultimately, I think relationships should be give and take. It makes perfect sense to me that you began to feel overwhelmed and tired, given your situation. Anyone would. Don't beat yourself up about the argument. All couples argue... it's perfectly natural and you had a right to express your needs.

okay I'm lots of different people's 'ex partner' then re sickies sense of entitlement immaturity depression ..sounds like a good fit @Sahara sorry to butt in

@Ghengis71, relationship break-ups are always difficult.... especially when they come out of the blue. You may have just chosen someone who was never going to be able to commit to you. Sometimes it's hard to know who has the strength and ability to see a committed relationship through. If you take a look at someone's background and relationship history you might be able to get a general idea.... also you have to take into account how much insight that person has into their own actions.

For example, I knew a guy who had been married 3 times and was looking seriously for wife number 4. When he described his previous marriages to me, at no time did he ever take any responsibility for what went wrong in any of those marriages! He was destined never to learn anything or make any effort to change his ways.

He, for example would not have been good at committing to relationships. Your ex-girlfriend might have been something like that, too.