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F.. M.. L..

Unknown userMember28 Apr 2021, 2:40 pm AEST

F.. M.. L..

I am so angry.

I went to see my doctor and my manager, but in both of those appointments, I felt like a lot was left unsaid.

I really wanted to explain the situation and get it all off my chest, but my doctor's appointment was really short and I couldn't see my manager in private, because someone else joined the conversation.

They were both productive, but unfortunately not what I hoped for.

Then I decided to go to the cinema.

As I'm sure you know, NSW has been offering $25 vouchers, two for dining out and two for entertainment. Unfortunately, though, I went to the cinema and THE APP DIDN'T [...] WORK!

The same thing happened last time, so I took a screenshot of my voucher, but you can't do that, it has to be done through the app. So I had to awkwardly walk away.

That party that I mentioned last week is tonight.. I'm going to be crying in bed alone, and my ex is going to be on a date just around the corner from my house.

I WANTED to do something for myself and the Universe conspired against me. Maybe tomorrow night..

...

I know you should be grateful for what you have, but it's difficult to be grateful for what you have when you don't have much at all.

There are lots of things you simply can't have unless you're in a friendship or a mutual relationship. Right now I don't know what a kiss feels like, and I can't change that without getting arrested LOL. It's just SO incredibly frustrating...

I know you shouldn't compare your life to others, but I don't think I'm wishing for much.. I don't want to be rich and famous, I just want to mean something, in a real, tangible way.

It makes me really angry when people say that this is normal.

I find that really hard to believe.

During the first lockdown last year, lots of people came out with advice about how to deal with being separated from your friends.. but no-one had any advice about dealing with feelings of isolation in the sense that you HAVE no friends in the first place.

Some people prefer to be alone. I'm not one of them... especially during the most painful time of my life so far.

I know I've said this all before, I apologise, but thank you.

5 replies

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In response to: F.. M.. L..

wellwellwellnezSenior Contributor28 Apr 2021, 6:00 pm AEST

Re: F.. M.. L..

No need to apologize. You working your end of the problem is helping us all. Alone is a lot of spectrums. Our alones are different and that's not comforting. And then, somehow, it is.

I've had some success with attachment theory, because its helped differentiate between social anxieties and relational anxieties. They're often connected but not the same thing.

Turning your attention to the social order is helpful to. The social order is far too causal, of all of our symptoms, to get away with it. I'm talking people vs system stuff (and that's a lot of stuff) I want this "new normal" into the "NEW new normal", for all of our sakes. Optimistic me (and you don't have to be "optimistic" to take action (though it can help)) looks forward to the age of identity evolving into the age of inter-sectionalism (maybe identity is the first stage towards that (for the sake being optimism (but it does make sense))).

In response to: F.. M.. L..

AussieRechargerSenior Contributor28 Apr 2021, 8:07 pm AEST

Re: F.. M.. L..

@Former-Member

What's normal??? i have recently decided that any kind of measurement language when it comes to life is just a fallacy. You can't measure life.

I have no idea where you are but have you tried the meetup app? I like it, and it's easy to just turn up to random events and be awkward because you know.. that's what I do. Not sure if the local pub near you does regular trivia or poker nights??? it just something to do and low cost and gets you social for a couple of hours. Volunteer for meals on wheels???

Just ideas and throwing it out there.. and then there are these things

https://www.laweekly.com/15-websites-like-omegle-alternatives-for-random-video-chat/

anyways.. i hope you feel better tomorrow. Are you actually 40 btw?

In response to: Re: F.. M.. L..

Unknown userMember28 Apr 2021, 8:16 pm AEST

Re: F.. M.. L..

@AussieRecharger .

Thank you... my concern is whether there is a base level of certain things.

Obviously having 500 Instagram followers is different from having a small group of friends, but they both work for different people. Human contact itself, though, is a need, and having absolutely no love of any form is a concern. I'm sure that's up for psychological debate.

Perhaps normal isn't the right word... healthy sounds too aggressive... I don't know. I saw an article that recommended using words like "typical" or "usual".

No, by the way 😂. Neither am I Florence 😉.

In response to: Re: F.. M.. L..

AussieRechargerSenior Contributor28 Apr 2021, 9:30 pm AEST

Re: F.. M.. L..

No, by the way 😂. Neither am I Florence 😉.

haha.. that clears up so much!! thanks for the link. No Aunty flo for you.

In response to: F.. M.. L..

hellenContributor29 Apr 2021, 3:33 am AEST

Re: F.. M.. L..

loneliness is an epidemic in australia, australians are the most isolated socially in the world. so you are anything but alone, but i think the media aren't equipped to help with this, only clinical counselling

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