I need help

I am going through a heartbreak now, so I definitely feel like I am qualified to talk about this!

The biggest piece of advice I can give you is to try to separate yourself from the events. He hurt you, and that has nothing to do with your own worth. That's entirely within him, and what he's capable of. He has to take responsibility for that, not you.

Your latest partner broke up with you, and he's not there for you, but that doesn't mean no-one else ever could be. That decision, to leave you, was entirely within him. It doesn't define your worth.

Importantly, though, try not to put any expectations on yourself. Just take your time, let yourself feel. Perhaps you need to get all the emotion out and process your feelings of grief before you're ready to accept a new perspective. I know the above is hard to believe, but that's just because you're not ready to think about it yet.

In the meantime, take care of yourself x.

I'm really sorry that this happened. Your brain, and your ex-husband, want you to give in and sleep forever. I need you to fight. Just be patient with yourself while that happens.

All the best ❤.

Dear sis,

I hear you. People come to our lives take most of us when they leave. The scars they leave extreamely painful. They ateal our whole world and run away, leaving us in a black hole. Because we loved them much beyond our own self. We complete lose our selves in an illusion they creat in front of us. This where yiu are now to my understanding but it's a punch of sand but what you are feeling is much deeper for a stranger to understand I know.

I was there 15 years ago, I grabbed what I mostly loved at the time and escaped from everything toxic and hurt. I moved countries, my only purpose of living was my two very young sons I grabbed and escaped. After 15 years I felt like I survived the storm but I have lot of scars and still suffering from traumas. That's why I'm here. I am feeling so lonely same as you as my sons are now young men.
So you are not alone, what we all need to survive is a purpose. It can be something simple and innocent, my 3 pets give me a purpose now to get through this. I force my self to get up every morning because they are hungry and ask me food. My dog is waiting at the door for me to take him for walk , poor thing can't do it his own, so got no choice , I love them, they love me, so I get up.
Do you think something like this might help you ? Then you have a purpose.
Much Love to you,

❤️

@LonelyLady1 I understand how you must feel. I think you are going through some very sensitising emotional stuff which is making your situation and prospects look hopeless. But its not.

I separated from my ex 10 years ago and I am now in my 50's. i learned to enjoy my own company no matter how hard it was to begin with.

I did try and go back with another old flame but got rejected so I know how this rejection you had is affecting you. Learn to be on your own. Its easier said than done.

There are many reasons people enter into relationships but you have to be able to sit with your own company and not be in need of others to full the vaccuum so to speak.

Once you are doing things with your own life and are being fulfilled you will attract men who will be interested in sharing things with you.

I've come to the conclusion however that I'm not realy interested anymore. I don't need a man to make me whole.

I would rather be alone.

Use this time constructively to build your self worth. Immerse yourself in self education and broaden your horizons.

It will be time well spent in investing in YOU and developing your strengths as a woman which people will find appealing

You were able to connect while at the same time de-programming yourself from abuse-conditioning. Now, after that HUGE success, here you are. Still connecting. Getting back your humanity because you and humanity deserve nothing less. You're radiant.

You're right, I need to focus on what I learned and celebrate that. When I left my husband I thought I'd never date anyone. I'd been with my husband since high school. I had the courage to meet someone, open my heart, practice relationship skills. And I learned I need to take things slowly in the future. And have better boundaries. But live and learn and pain is part of that.