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Anxiety and driving

EmzSenior Contributor30 Aug 2016, 9:45 pm AEST

Anxiety and driving

I have been diagnosed with a panic disorder and social anxiety and driving has always been hard for me. I find crowds quite stressful, and when I am driving on a busy road its pretty much the same. I've had my lisence for over a year now but still have a mega fear of driving in the city. Parking in busy areas nearly always reduces me to tears and I refuse to drive through the city unless someone comes with me to talk me through it.

Unfortunately I live 5kms from Melbourne's CBD so its pretty unavoiable, although I do my best by being picky about the times and days I drive. However, this issue I have with driving is really starting to affect my life, especially now that I am back to job hunting. I don't mind taking public transport to work but many jobs in my line of work require me to drive.

I feel lost and embaressed. I know that I can drive, I am fine in outer suburbs and the country, but when I get to a crowded area I freeze up and it takes everything to not jump out of my car and run. What can I do to get over this?

4 replies

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In response to: Anxiety and driving

Unknown userMember31 Aug 2016, 9:56 pm AEST

Re: Anxiety and driving

Hi @Emz, as someone who lives in Melbourne too I empathise about driving in this city. It's nuts! The trams, hook turns, pedestrians that expect all cars to give way at all times. I don't have an anxiety condition but I believe I could develop one if I had to drive in the CBD on a frequent basis.

But that doesn't really help you! I would imagine that feeling better in this situation will need the same sort of strategies that help to manage anxiety in other circumstances. The right self-talk, control of your breathing (and therefore the flight or flight response that's making your heart hammer and body sweat) and a willingness to pause for a minute (once you've pulled over) to regain control when you feel on the edge. And giving yourself plenty of time so that's not an additional stress.

My partner has never driven and it's had an impact on the jobs he can apply for. Lots of outreach roles in his sector. But he's accepted this as he knows that driving isn't for him. He's always got work. With any luck this is a bridge you won't actually need to cross. Good luck with the job hunt.

In response to: Anxiety and driving

CherubContributor31 Aug 2016, 10:15 pm AEST

Re: Anxiety and driving

Hi Emz,
I have just registered for the very first time and yours is the first post I've read. I just want to say you're not alone!! I live in a much smaller city than Melbourne and have issues with traffic lights. As soon as I have to stop at a red light I get that urge to jump out and run that you spoke of. I think it has to do with feeling trapped/stuck and don't have the option of freedom to move. There is no way I'd even contemplate driving in Melbourne personally so I can understand where you are coming from.
I have managed to overcome this once before and it took a good couple of months the of desensitisation. Making myself go through as many traffic lights as possible. Counting backwards in threes (or sometimes just counting in seconds), deep breathing, sipping water, chewing gum, air con on face, singing, talking to my passengers etc. I came good but after a period of high stress in my life it has come back so I'm back to square one. But I've done it before and I will do it again. Hopefully you find some strategies that help you. Just don't avoid it. We know that avoidance of triggers fuels anxiety!

In response to: Re: Anxiety and driving

QueenieSenior Contributor31 Aug 2016, 10:17 pm AEST

Re: Anxiety and driving

@Emz I take my hat off to you driving despite the anxiety it creates! Well done!!

I used to drive previous to a traffic accident (which I was at fault) and although there is nothing stopping me from legally driving, the thought terrifies me. Just sitting in the driver's seat makes me want to literally run as far as possible.

For me I'll have to face facts that I will likely never drive again and look for jobs in which I am based in the one place (which narrows it down somewhat as in my field, driving is almost part of the selection criteria). However I'm confident I'll get there and work around it.

I've only ever visited Melbourne and never drove in it. It seemed very confusing traffic-wise. Again I take my hat off to you!

In response to: Re: Anxiety and driving

EmzSenior Contributor31 Aug 2016, 11:45 pm AEST

Re: Anxiety and driving

Thank you all so much for your comments. Just knowing that I am not alone makes me feel so releived! I spend far too much time comparing myself to other people my age that don't understand and feeling like I should be embaressed. My partner also does not understand which makes it worse and causes fights (he doesn't have his lisence so relies on me to drive).

I like the tips about distracting myself, I always find myself calmer if I have music on, so hopefully the other things will help. 🙂

I plan to move to the country once I have finished my studies so hopfeully I will not have this problem forever. It is so frustrating letting anxiety get in the way of my life!

Not driving at all sounds difficult Queenie, I hope you are near public transport!

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